somethingsomethingdotcom

every day is thanksgiving in our house...

2010-04-22T21:00:00.000-04:00

i do not like cats. my oldest sister is allergic to cats and cigarette smoke. when we were little and visited my granny trani's house (that had cats in it and uncles who smoked), my sister had to be rushed to the ER on more than one occasion. (why we continued to stay at my g'ma t.'s house after jennie's asthma attacks is beyond me, but i'm sure my parents had a very good reason...).

my parents warned me that if i ever smoked, they would cut off my right arm. they also promised to cut off my left arm if i dyed my hair. i think that was just a scare tactic though. when i did dye my hair blond it turned out so horrible (think school bus yellow) that they must have thought how i looked was punishment enough and they didn't get out their body dismemberer.

but, i never smoked. and i never liked cats. cats and smoke equalled jennie practically dying.

when i was in the peace corps, living in the island nation of kiribati, i discovered something i hated more than cats -- mosquitoes. and also: rats. i could get a cat if jennie was never planning on visiting me there, right? kiribati cats were not snugglers -- they were rat hunters. so i got one. a boy. and i named him sprinkles. "ten tiakurati tamaiti sprinkles suzanne jonathan" to be exact.. *see footnotes for full etymology lesson.

i really wanted to love sprinkles, but he didn't love me. he ended up hanging out at my neighbor's house more than at mine, and then he was brutally murdered by wild dogs. it was a common joke in kiribati to joke about someone's death. when the old lady next door told me that sprinkles was dead when i inquired about his whereabouts, i dismissed her as an old liar (it was perfectly fine to say that to someone's face). when my teacher friend told me later in the day that it was in fact true that sprinkles was dead, school was cancelled for the rest of the day so the boys could dig him a grave and give him a proper burial.

though my heart was bruised, mainly by the callous treatment of the topic of death, i still had the problem of rats. so i got another cat. hazel -- a girl this time. or so i thought. when those teeny little cat balls finally did descend, hazel was re-christened hazelnuts. he didn't like me either.

then i moved in with Mo and met the first cat i ever loved: FRANKLIN. he is the fattest cat with a belly that hangs low to the ground and he has mitten paws (the kind that hemingway loved with an extra toe...). sadly, ella, the 3-legged mini schnauzer does not like cats.

and then we moved (we being ella & i), and then we moved again, and then we had a boyfriend who had a cat and kept the cat litter in the bathroom -- yuck! that relationship never would have worked out for me & ella...

and then we moved again. into a house with two cats whom i have come to love. they are paul's "business partner" andrew's cats. long ago, a very fat calico cat made her way to andrew's doorstop and he began to feed her. she kept hanging around so he decided to keep her. he named her turkey because her markings reminded him of a wild turkey (and i think because he likes to drink bourbon and also because i think it was around thanksgiving time). needless to say, this story goes like many stories of fat cats: the fat cat had kittens. a whole litter of them who were named, fittingly, gravy, cranberry, stuffing, sweet potato, & mashed potato. andrew kept gravy -- a male orange tabby. andrew has since left the house that he and paul built. much to my chagrin (because i hate cats, remember?), he left those damn cats.

and i couldn't be happier. i've learned how to clean kitty litter (that is kept in the basement up high so ella can't eat it like she loves to do, thank you very much). i've learned how to deal with chipmunks, rabbits, birds, & mice in the house (because turkey & gravy like to show off what they've caught). i've frontlined them, & fitted them with the most stylish of collars (which gravy promptly lost). i've bought them catnip toys and i cuddle with them. i get up at 2:30 am when they claw at the sliding glass door wanting attention. and i love them (but shh, don't tell anyone).

and now that we are moving again (we being paul, & sierra, & ella, & i), we will also be taking turkey & gravy with us.

i'm still learning to love cats. my friend eva is helping me -- it's hard to resist her and her main man lex luthor. he's one fancy cat and i'm very thankful for that.

* ten is the kiribati word for boy and is added before a person's name for formality's sake, such as mister. the kiribati word for girl is nei. i was called nei suzanne, or nei miss by my students, which actually translates to "miss miss," go figure. tiakurati is the word for chocolate in kiribati. since the kiribati language has no Ss, "ti" is used for the "s" sound. now sound "tia-ku-ra-ti" out. doesn't it make much more sense? sprinkles was a black cat, so of course he was chocolate sprinkles. sprinkles was a tom cat -- hence the "tomaiti" (thomas, sound it out). in kiribati, a person's father's first name was their last name, and their grandfather's first name was their next last name. i was suzanne jonathan milton. sprinkles got to be sprinkles suzanne jonathan. actually, if you want to get technical, tutien is the correct way to spell my name in kiribati. blah blah blah.

red carpet, grey couch, green sweatpants...

2010-03-12T18:00:00.000-05:00

as always, the ladies of leisure wore our very own stylish pjs and walked our very own berber carpet for oscar's night. we satiated our hungry selves (since we'd been fasting for days to fit into our one-of-a-kind sweats) on leonardo's takeout, homemade chocolate cake, pretzels, chips, chocolate-covered raisins, candy & munchies galore. since we knew the award for best picture would be neck-and-neck between Avatar and The Hurt Locker, margot (an honorary lady of leisure) prepared us two drinks -- a blue avatar cocktail and a hurt locker cocktail. the brownish hurt locker cocktail was supposed to be set on fire, but we were already too buzzed to try something that dangerous -- we're not a bomb squad for pete's sake!

hooray for kathryn bigelow for beating out her philandering ex-husband james cameron. and hooray for the ladies of leisure for staying up past midnight!

commercial break:

tea anyone?

2010-02-21T22:10:00.002-05:00

my mom is a pretty good knitter. (understatement).

one time i asked her to make me a felted bag. a month later: i had a beautiful felted bag and she had 3 more requests from my friends and sisters.

then i wanted a shawl to keep me warm.

another time i requested hand wristies to keep my fingers warm while i typed at work. she'd never made those before, but that didn't stop her. she even decided to try cable knit. don't think she'd done that before either. those wristies are keeping my hands warm right now as i type.

my next request was for cable knit pink leg warmers for my jazz of the '80s dance class. they were much coveted and pretty much stole the show of our fame performance (overstatement-- i'm not that good of a dancer, even if the leg warmers were stunning).

my mom likes a challenge and i like hot tea. my latest request was for a tea cozy to keep my ceramic tea pot steaming.

the best part about this tea cozy (besides the obvious that it keeps my tea warm and that my mom made it for me with love) is that it is made from bits of yarn leftover from all the projects mom's ever made for me. now that makes me and my tea feel pretty darn cozy.

thanks mom! love you!

pepper

2010-01-05T17:29:00.000-05:00

our beloved pepper had to be put to sleep last night. she was over 14 years old. pepper came into our lives long before the dawn of the digital camera, but that didn't stop us from documenting her puppyhood. she was our everything. however cliche it sounds, she truthfully was our pride & joy. i couldn't wait to get home to see her, to walk her, to sing to her, to cuddle with her.

i remember the day we picked her out. jules and i were playing volleyball with our high school team in gouverneur, NY. it was 1995 -- i was a junior and jules a freshman. i usually sat the bench and wished the game to be finished, and that day was no exception. this time i was eager for the game to end so that we could go see the litter of new mini schnauzer puppies.

we picked pepper out, and struggled with names. i believe chloe and snickers were top-runners, but derek came up with the name that fit her so well.

pepper liked to hide in our garden, stretch out with her long legs (we called her long dog), and take long, luxurious naps.

we posed with her with our prom dates, we dressed her up, we gave her nicknames -- champ (that was the time period that she wore a medal around her neck), shithead (that was the time period when she had a few accidents), pepperdini, pep.

she loved chewing on and ripping apart slippers. one christmas we bought her her very own pair of pink piggy slippers to destroy as she pleased. she was our baby to spoil and love, and we couldn't have been happier.

i'm sure you've all heard this story, but i have to retell it. after pepper was over a year old, mom & dad thought it would be superfun to breed her and have more mini-schnauzer puppies. i was horrified by the thought of my poor, innocent little pepper being molested and raped, and i cried and cried when we dropped her off at the breeders.

she came back a "woman," and she was indeed, "knocked up." i still claim that it changed her -- she was moody and grumpy and snappy, and not the same sweet innocent pepper puppy that she had been. but she was still our pepper.

she gave birth to 6 puppies -- 5 girls and 1 boy. jennie and derek got cocoa (whom they still have and who just ate a whole leftover turkey carcas by standing on the garbage pedal and stealthily removing the remains -- that cost her a night in the ER and jennie & derek an arm and a leg. but really, what wouldn't we do for our animals?). mom and dad kept wilbur, the runt, who pepper one day mistakenly crushed. mom and dad gave him mouth to snout resuscitation and he's been slightly braindead and always hungry ever since.

when i returned from the peace corps after two and a half years of being away, pepper greeted me with howls of happiness. we'd never heard her be so vocal before -- she yelped and yelped at me, as if she was telling me to never ever go away for so long ever again.

at one point, our family had 5 mini-schnauzers. we used to play the "guess the schnauzie" game. one could always tell it was pepper because she licked you immediately.

i said goodbye to pepper when i left malone after christmas a few weeks ago. i had a feeling it might be the last time i saw her. she gave me a lick and i gave her a kiss. she'll always be my best schnauzer girl with 4 legs. i feel sad for me, and i feel sad for wilbur, but most of all i feel sad for my mom and dad. they had her in their everyday lives the longest, and things won't be the same around 23 park street for a little while.

thank you mom and dad for letting pepper into our lives. she taught us how to love and how to care for someone other than ourselves. we will love and miss you forever pep!

i'm a star!

2009-12-23T08:38:00.001-05:00

i've been getting a bit of video press lately all because of my very good friend eva sollberger and her amazing technical skillz. fun fun.

here's last week's NASA presentation: http://7d.blogs.com/stuckinvt/2009/12/welcome-home-hanna-157.html

and FlynnArts' teen/adult dance showcase: http://www.facebook.com/video/video.php?v=206823993679&ref=mf (if you haven't joined facebook yet, what the heck are you waiting for?)

extra extra, read all about it!

2009-11-10T10:06:00.001-05:00

for mom, dad, and the other non-facebookers out there: my side business, let them eat cake, was featured in last week's seven days! read all about it here: single serving.

an apple a day

2009-10-14T13:43:00.001-04:00

what's better than finding half a worm in your apple?

finding a whole worm so you can photograph it and share with the world that you actually did once in your life have an apple with a worm in it.

because seriously, how many people has this truly happened to?

today, i consider myself lucky. also: consider this logic: because there was a worm in my apple i had to go get myself a peanutbutter chocolate chip cookie from the red onion. what else was i to eat for my 5 pm snack before dance class? surely there was not enough time to run to city market for another piece of potentially infested fruit!

how does our garden grow?

2009-09-21T22:46:00.000-04:00

given that i've had this post in my head since, oh say, april, and that i've been taking photos of our garden all summer long, and that fall is upon us, i'm finally getting around to posting about our green thumb (thumbs?). truthfully, i've been stuck on the title -- i wanted something like mary, mary quite contrary, but paulie, paulie, quite the dolly, or suzie, suzie, quite the floozy, just weren't rolling off the tongue.

remember back in march when warm & sunny days were nowhere in sight and i posted about planting some seedlings and demanded spring to spring? well, here is how our garden grew:

first came the lettuce:

then came the sugar snap peas (my favorite):

then came the teeniest carrots and garlic and onions that you ever did see:

then came the tomatoes that seemed like they'd never turn to red, though they eventually did:

and then came the day when paul was tired of throwing out garbage that dripped & i was tired of not having a garbage disposal -- the very same day that we decided we might as well start preparing some soil for next year's garden.

martha stewart wannabe?

2009-09-16T09:21:00.002-04:00

about a month ago when i was perusing the "internets" for lemon chiffon icing recipes, i came across a lovely blog called the tender crumb. she had amazing pictures of the delicious things she had baked as part of her membership in a club called "Tuesdays with Dorie." a visit to TWD introduced me to about 50 other sites and bloggers (mainly women) who have gorgeous blogs dedicated to baking. each week these women bake the same item from Dorie Greenspan's cookbook and share their insights, tweeks, mishaps, & ideas. they are baking their way through her cookbook! at first i thought these women were crazy -- who has time for this? but i was strangely intrigued and found myself checking their sites almost every day. paul was nervous. and then i watched julie & julia and was inspired. could i too follow my dream and become a baker and a blogger, and perhaps get my own book deal? i mean if jen of cakewrecks did it by posting ugly cake photos and adding snarky comments, then why can't suzanne "Q Monroe" lowell, of let them eat cake do it?

i caved. i joined one of those baking blog clubs! the one i joined is a bit more manageable for my crazy life. it's called the martha stewart cupcake club. in this club, we bake one recipe a month from martha stewart's new cupcake book (which is very cool). i'm already a bit behind though! i was supposed to bake zucchini spice cupcakes and post pictures and my baking tale by yesterday the 15th. i have a very good reason why i am behind though...

i am being hired for my very first wedding! i baked all day sunday -- 4 different recipes -- 2 different cakes -- 3 different types of frosting! that topic deserves a blog post of it's very own. which is coming soon. with pics.

but this post is just to apologize to my new blogworld friends -- i'm sorry i haven't posted or baked the zucchini spice cupcakes yet. please don't kick me out of the MSC club! i promise i will catch up.

for now, if you're interested, check out the MSC blogroll and visit all of these bakers' sites -- they are incredible.

knight island

2009-08-30T20:31:00.001-04:00

our camping shopping list looked like this: "coffee, white gas, & macncheese." our remember to bring next time list looked like this: "spray-in conditioner, camping chairs, & coffee."

hurricane dan was hot on our heels, and it was windy and wet, but we made the most of it. it was a very lucky weekend indeed. i spotted a garden snake, paul caught two fish, & we didn't capsize (but check out the size of some of those whitecaps!).

this is our second year in a row at knight island. the island is a remote little spot east of north hero, up near st. albans. there are only 7 campsites, each with their own lean-to, picnic table, firepit, & composting toilet. we had a sweet little spot right on the water and the blustering winds held the bugs at bay. the sites are spread out over the 185 acres and it feels like you're the only one there. except of course for ranger steve (paul's new idol).

ella & sierra had a blast, though they weren't that keen on the cleaning up part.

deep in the heart

2009-08-26T17:18:00.005-04:00

howdy m'darlins! i'm melting here in san antonio where it was almost 90 degrees at about 7 am for the 5K i ran in this morning. the news predicted the temperature would be 100 degrees by 5 pm. we go from air-conditioned building to air-conditioned car. apparently in texas, the colder your A/C is, the richer you are -- that goes for trucks too -- the bigger it is, the better you are. hm, interesting status symbols you have texas.

i'm here for a computer conference through my work, and am thoroughly enjoying staying in a fancy hotel right on the riverwalk with my colleague leigh. the flynn sent me to tucson two years ago for the annual tessitura conference, which helped me break the surface of understanding our intricate database system that we use to keep track of constituents. this time around, i feel like i've got a snorkel and mask, and can now see at least 20 ft down. i'm not a computer geek, i swear, though i'm sure most of the computer geeks here claim that too...

i came to san antonio back in 2003 when my friend sarah got married, but didn't have much time to explore with all of the wedding festivities. last night was "on your own in san antone" night (tessitura is all about the puns and catchy phrases), so leigh and i headed out to "el mercado," the mexican markets where brightly painted pottery, sombreros, & those wooden croaking frogs abound. we had a feast at mi tierra, the classy mexican restaurant pictured above. we sampled the requisite margaritas, and just barely managed to avoid eye contact with the men who were attempting to serenade any table that would listen.

next we hit the alamo. nothing notable to say about that because we all remember it, don't we? it's small. it's adobe like. there were horse drawn buggies hoping to snag the next willing tourist. the flag wouldn't quite cooperate for the picture because there is no breeze here.

we walked up & down the riverwalk hoping for some relief (quintessential photo below). leigh searched for hot sauce for her husband, while i searched for the perfect cowboy hat for myself. you can't see the many hats i donned because all of the stores had signs up that clearly read "no taking pictures with hats." i still haven't found the right one -- perhaps tonight, our last night on the town. i only wish i could afford a matching pair of cowboy boots with spurs.

it's nice (sortof) to visit (ok, not really), but truthfully, i would never ever in my right mind want to live here. don't tell texas that though, you know what they say about messing with it.

can't wait to get to my home sweet home vermont.

get ready...

2009-08-20T09:20:00.003-04:00

after 3 months of paying two mortgages, paul & i are finally down to only one! which means we just might be able to handle another bill. which means that today we are getting cable & internet! just in time for baseball & the world series. just in time for me to finally write down all those stories and to showcase all the pictures i've been planning on sharing. hold on to your hats folks -- somethingsomething is a-coming!

tooting my horn

2009-07-31T16:41:00.009-04:00

i have played the clarinet since i was in fifth grade. mrs. poupoure was kind of mean, but for some reason, she liked me, and though i hated practicing at times, i really have always loved playing, and i was actually kind of good at it. i played through high school and even played in the orchestra in college for a few semesters. i have anita kinsley's old clarinet that jen (her daughter & my best friend) played until she couldn't stand it anymore, because jen disliked mrs. poupore just about as much as mrs. poupore disliked jen). we had these practice sheets we had to fill out with the times & days of the week we'd practiced. we were expected to play for at least 30 minutes, 6 days a week, and we had to have our parents sign the sheet to prove we weren't just making it up. my mom would never sign it if i'd put in some fake practicing hours. luckily, my dad sometimes would.

anyway, the fact that i play the clarinet has escaped most people in my present life, simply because, i don't play the clarinet anymore. in fact, my boyfriend did not realize i played the clarinet until about a month ago -- though, he's not always one for details...

about 3 months ago, when my boss was putting together this year's FlynnArts' summer teen musical, "Once Upon A Mattress" (the most interesting tale of the Princess & the Pea you may ever hear), I piped up and volunteered to play in the orchestra. it was sort of like the double dog dare i have to give myself when i sign up for a race -- better start running or else. better start practicing or else...

I brought my clarinet to work, planning to pop upstairs to the music studio on free moments to start getting my chops back in shape & to familiarise myself with various scales and fingerings again. i should have had mrs. poupore's time sheet...

of course i did not start practicing until 3 weeks before the show. the music was difficult to say the least. 5 or 6 sharps in the key! and runs that my fingers and mouth could not keep up with! why why must they write D# when it's really an Eb? Someone who knows a little bit more about music theory could answer that question.

but the show went great -- it was hilarious, and the orchestra didn't sound half bad either (the flute covered the runs). i was happy to be a part of it and happy to be part of the flynnarts program. surprise, surprise, i have actually been liking my day job.

though, i still like my night job better -- i made this cake for the cast. i was really so impressed with their dedication and maturity. wish you could have seen the show!

for the most up-to-date photos of my cakes, check out let them eat cake's facebook page & become a fan...

what have we done to anger you so?

2009-06-17T17:08:00.005-04:00

on friday i got my first black eye. my sister's boyfriend's dog, philo (like the dough and the mountain) jumped up to greet me and bonked me with his rather large nose. i held in the tears this time.

as were were heading to bed in the loft of my grandparents A-frame log cabin, i asked paul if he was sure he wanted to sleep on the inside. sleeping on the inside means that there are one and a half feet between you and the slanted roof. i reminded him that i'd been sleeping in the loft at star lake all my life and that i was very used to sleeping in an A-frame. he scoffed at me and assured me that he too had experience sleeping in an A-frame. Not 10 minutes later did one of the dogs bark, causing paul to sit straight up, bonking the bridge of his nose. the whole cabin shook.

with the egg on his forehead and the shiner on my face, one might question our domestic situation...

32! 32! 32! 32! 32!

2009-06-12T09:04:00.009-04:00

when my very best friend colleenie turned 30, her mother-in-law cut out 100 colleen faces and stuck them on paint stirring sticks. when colleen walked into the room for her surprise party, she stared at a room full of herself wishing her a happy birthday.

i missed the party because my sister was supposed to be giving birth any second. but i saw colleen the very next weekend and was given a souvenir from the big bash.

i put it on my dresser and ella barked & growled at it. i had to put it in the corner behind the curtain. when josh was helping me move he nearly jumped out of his skin when he saw it.

i can't throw colleen's face away. it's too funny. it's a conversation piece. and for the moment, it's in my bag of halloween costumes.

paul does not understand why we need to keep it. he also does not understand why i have to have a bag of halloween costumes, or why i have to keep a bag of gift boxes. i think my stuff might be overwhelming him just a little.

yesterday paul woke up and he was a 32 year old. a very grumpy 32 year old. i'm not sure if it was all my stuff cluttering his house, the fact that he was a year older, or that he was scared that he'd matched up with a packrat.

i did my best to make him happy. i think it worked.

oh the week i've had!

2009-06-07T23:59:00.004-04:00

sunday, 5/31:
a: killed my car's battery.
b: took my cell phone for a drag in the lake

wednesday, 6/3: woke up to bunny screams. saved a bunny from my cat (more on the fact that i even have a cat later).

thursday, 6/4: fell out of the boat while disembarking, onto a rock, smack on my tailbone. tears ensued.

sunday, 6/7:
struck a deer at 5 am, driving home from the mansfield, ma phish show. waited in lebanon, nh till 9 am when the car rental place finally opened.

will my luck ever turn around?

not karma this time, just plain stupidity

2009-06-01T16:21:00.007-04:00

two things you need to know for this story:

1. when i was a little girl my grandparents nicknamed me wifty, for i was always forgetting, losing, or misplacing something and had a general spaciness about me.

2. this saying: "if you don't like the weather in VT, wait 5 minutes" and this illustration by dug Nap:

yesterday was truly a VT weather day. it really did do almost all of those things -- sun, hail, rain, sleet, rainbows, freezing cold temps, then really hot temps.

during a sunny part of the day, i took a quick car ride and left my windows rolled down.

during a rainy part of the day, i ran to my car to roll the windows up.

during a cloudy part of the day, i decided to get a nice cool run in. this is when i realized i had left my keys in the ignition and the ignition turned on. my car was dead.

during a sunny part of the day, while my car was hopefully recharging itself (no such luck), i went for a kayak. it threatened to be windy, and to possibly rain, so this smarty pants put on her windbreaker and stuck her phone in her pocket.

during a warm part of the day, while huffing and puffing carrying my kayak to the water, i took my windbreaker off and wrapped it around my waist.

during a windy part of the day, while i was huffing and puffing and paddling into the wind, i realized that something was dragging in the water. it was my cell phone pocket.

during a very very windy, so windy part of the day that lake water was splashing into my kayak, i took my cell phone apart and tried to dry it off. and then, for safe keeping, i zipped the 3 pieces of my cell phone into what i thought was my very secure pocket, when in actuality, it was my pit zip (mind you, the jacket was still wrapped around my waist, so it was hard to tell what was what, but seriously wifty, don't you think you should have double checked, considering your first two mishaps of the day?).

during a rainy part of the day, as i was pulling my kayak up onto the beach, my neighbor called to me that i had just dropped something. and so, during that rainy part of the day, i retraced my steps and luckily (yeah right) found the other 2 pieces of my cell phone that had fallen out of my pit zip, nestled safely in the grass.

then, during another rainy part of the day, my next door neighbor kindly helped me jump my car.

during a sunny part of the day, danielle & i decided to go get a drink and sit outside on church street to enjoy the sun (though i had to drive over to make contact & this plan with her because i still don't have internet at the lake and as you very well know, my cell phone was out of service). it started hailing on my way over, but i was way too frustrated at this point to go home to cover our tomato plants!

during a windy windy windy, so windy part of the day that i could not see through the wreck that was my hair, danielle & i were nearly blown over and had to cancel our outside drink plans and settle for pho hung.

during a rainy part of the day(time) of the night, i watched silly british tv with eva and enjoyed some hot tea and popcorn, cozy in her house away from the wet whistling wind.

the weather pattern continued late into the night. i came home to find a very large tree branch on the front yard and i couldn't even call anyone or take a picture and send it to someone (who was seeing a rainbow over Phish @ Fenway...)

p.s. sadly, the purpley-pink phone with the very fun ringtones is dead as a doornail. i've got my trusty silvery-grey cracked old phone working now though.

(sung to the tune of chameleon by boy george) karma karma karma karma karma come on karma, you come and go, you come and go oh oh

2009-05-26T13:00:00.004-04:00

i got pulled over last week.* i got yelled at at work.** i got in a huge yelling screaming crying fight with a guy on my condo association. i’m moving, i’m stressed, and things just don’t seem to be going my way. i’ve vowed to be a better person and a harder worker. i am trying, i just can't figure out why karma is biting me so hard in the butt.

this is the saga which i hope to have a happy ending for soon (or at least one i can live with): paul and i decided to move in together! hooray (a whole story about how we are even back together possibly coming soon). i put my place up for rent and of the 6 people/couples who saw the place, only one couple pursued the rental application – a young couple with two dogs (a saint bernard named kitten, so must be sweet as pie, right? and a beagle named fiona who likes to sleep on top of kitten, so they must be well-behaved dogs who get along smashingly with no barking, right?) i let my last roommate get a dog and wrote a quick note to the association that there was now a second dog in 10 hideaway lane. i heard nothing so assumed this procedure was the correct one.

come may 5 when i’m trying to follow all the correct procedures in being a landlord and inform my association of the four new tenants (12 legs in total), i’m told that the second dog must be approved by the board. request and appeal both denied by may 20. 11 days for me to find new renters and for kitten, fiona, and their owners to find a place that will let them all live.

do you think it’s fair that out of the 22 units in my association there are only 3 board members? do you think it’s fair that 2 of the board members live in my building? do you think that the wording of the by-laws, “a second pet must be approved by the board,” implies that a second pet is a possibility?

scene: board member one is pulling out of hideway lane, i am pulling in. we both roll down our windows and he informs me that the association has instructed him not to speak to be about the matter any further. “the association will handle me from there on out .” which means what? they will sue me if I let the renters move in? they will fine me? it’s my friggin’ house,” (i didn’t say friggin’ or any other expletive, after all, i am a lady), which board member one loudly reminds me that “it’s not just mine, we all share the building.” i try to appeal to his compassionate side (which i don’t think exists): “but they have no where else to go.” this does not budge his decision that only one dog be allowed per unit. and anyway, “this issue isn’t his problem, it’s mine, i’m the one who didn’t follow procedures in a timely process, and he would never do anything to put himself in jeopardy of being split from his dog, and he also was tired of wasting his valuable personal time on this matter.” to which i replied, “well you’re the one who chose to be on the board,” and then i said some other emotionally, irrational things and burst into tears. (i called later to apologize, after i called fiona & kitten’s parents to tell them they’d been evicted even before they’d had a chance to move in).

so, i’m looking for new renters, with only one pet allowed (though maybe they could be annoying in some other way that doesn’t go against association by-laws, so that my neighbors still won’t have peace & quiet). oh well, the board members can enjoy their little condos while I bask out here in the sun on the lake where my dogS can run free. i’m not bitter.

but see, that’s where karma creeps in. how to be a good person, try to do everything right, get bitten on the butt, and then not want retribution for that? but then I need to remind myself that i’ve hurt others in other ways, and life hasn’t always been fair for other people when it has been for me. an eye for an eye, a heart for a heart. not one of the golden rules.

i just hope fiona & kitten’s parents find a place soon… (because I felt so terrible I told them they could live at hideaway lane FREE for the month, without one dog that is, until they find a new place). anyone know of a place where two dogs can stay? anyone know of anyone who needs a place to hideaway?

how's your karma? it comes and goes for me.

craig's listing: http://burlington.craigslist.org/apa/1199398276.html

* amazingly, i only got a warning.

** i'd asked for permission to use flash photography and received it, and then got yelled at by someone else not to use the flash. get your stories straight people.

3.1+5.6+6.4+5.5+5.6=26.2 & 13.1+13.1=26.2

2009-05-25T13:41:00.005-04:00

ah, VCM 2009. that’s the start of summer for my family. we’ve been participating in the marathon since about 2005 and our numbers have been increasing ever since.last year, jennie and julie trained for their respective parts of the half together, but didn’t like not getting to run together. So, this year, they enlisted the collins brothers to run the other half of their halves, so they could run together.

team j squared

team two young lovers with nothing better to do (10 points for song & artist)

derek split the marathon with his younger brother jeremy, and although they both had very different training strategies, they finished well. derek is the only runner i know who smiles while he’s pounding the pavement. yesterday he had more of a determined facial expression and didn’t even acknowledge us when he ran by us at the waterfront coastguard station. His determination paid off and he came in at about 1:20.

The less daring (stupid? masochistic?) members of my extended family chose to split the 26.2 miles five ways. lynn (derek’s mom), danielle (derek’s sister & my good friend), stephanie (jeremy’s wife & my childhood friend), chris (derek’s best friend & my former swim teacher), and i each ran a portion of the marathon. it was a rainy day, which i preferred for my 5.6 miles, though the spectators weren’t as keen to get soaked. baxter, paige, emma, marg, jon, and alan were fair weather fans and chose to spend the rainy morning napping and playing indoors, and left soon after the starting whistle blew. paul, the super spectator stuck it out on his bike and made sure to place himself at prime cheering locations. before i ran my leg, i asked bax for any strategies he might have. he had run his first race on Saturday – the YAM (youth athletic movement) scram for ages 4+. he ran his .5 mile race with the same determination and facial expression as his father (who may or may not have had tears in his eyes when he pinned his sons bib on). the proud parents ran with their son, and the proud aunt suz looked just like she did in the birthing room – camera in one hand, video camera in the other, racing from one side of the loop to the other for a glimpse.

baxter’s advice was this: run really fast, pass as many people as you can, and have lots of people behind you. i tried my best. he also fueled me up with power kisses and a great big power hug, and i did just fine, though there were plenty of people ahead of me (but plenty of people behind me too).

carb loading with strawberry waffles before his grueling .5 miles

there were 11 runners total in our contingency (though tim, jeff, & julie are missing from our photo because however fast those collins brothers run, they are slow slow slow and didn’t make it to our group photography session in time).

timmy tim, wearing hiking shorts, no less

paul and i hosted the annual carb-loading, pasta dinner this year at his (almost ours) place on lake iroquois.

penne pomodoro, garlic bread a la julie & tim, and salad & rhubarb crisp a la derek’s garden, fueled us for Sunday, and the after party at jennie & derek’s (featuring beer can chicken and mom’s famous turtle nut cake) helped us replenish all the calories we’d burned.

tidbits that you hopefully didn’t miss: the woman who came in under 3 hours who had poop running down her legs, the bloody nipples of many of the men (jeremy tried his best to stop the rubbing, but it was hard to run 13.1 miles holding his shirt away from his chest), and the portapotty signs that said, “flip me over when out of TP.” lynn and i didn’t know how we were going to possibly flip over a portapotty, but paul set us straight when he showed us how to simply flip over the sign.

will i brave the 13.1 miles next year for my 3rd lifetime half? jennie & julie now have 3 under their belts. i’m just not that much into competition. running is supposed to be fun, right? right? actually, it really was.

to see more marathon photos, become my facebook friend: http://www.facebook.com/album.php?aid=81960&id=703677265&l=621896f786

somethingsomethings a brewin'

2009-05-22T09:24:00.002-04:00

i've got posts galore stored up in my head people -- so sorry it's been so long. i'm without internet at home for the moment, but soon. i promise, soon.

hoppy hoppy

2009-04-12T17:13:00.018-04:00

my older sister wished me a happy easter this morning. she doesn't believe in easter. she believes in candy. she believes that jesus was most likely a good man who was crucified. i don't think she believes the whole coming back to life thing. of what i know about religion, the jews believe that jesus existed, hell -- jesus was a jew. but that he wasn't the messiah. the jews believe the messiah is still to come. let's hope so. i'm half jewish and easter was never a big to-do in my family. besides missing the kids and their easter egg hunt and my mom's ham, doing easter with my boyfriend's polish family wasn't a hardship. and, it actually turned out to be fun. i'd never eaten borscht before. and i'd never heard the fun stories or seen the cute pictures that i did this weekend.

i still don't know what i believe about easter and jesus and christianity and religion. i may never will. what i do like about easter time is that it's a time of growth, rebirth, renewal, & spring. this time (perhaps because of tax season) reminds me to take stock, appreciate what i have, plan for the future, spring clean, and be happy. and if i'm ever not happy, it reminds me to do something to remedy that situation.

hoppy hoppy.

opening day: paigey gets to second base

2009-04-07T22:40:00.007-04:00

a recent "titillating" conversation...

scene: after dinner, paige sits on aunt suzie's lap.

paige: suzie?

me: paigey?

p: why you wearing purple pig shirt? (remember people, she's almost 3, and she sometimes drops her pronouns)

me (thinking fast, because in actuality i grabbed it because it was the first clean thing i saw on my floor and i was going to eva's for a slumber party and was basically going to be in my pajamas anyway, and the purple pig shirt is sooo soft): because i knew i was going to see you paige, and i know how much you like purple and pigs.

p: oh.

scene: paige continues touching aunt suzie's shirt, right around the perfectly placed pig's snout and curly-Q tail. the touching becomes more like poking.

p: suzie?

me: paigey?

p: what are these?

me: well, paigey, those are my breasts.

p: why?

me: well, paigey, because, i'm a girl.

p: i'm a girl...

me: yes, you are a girl...

p (lifting up her shirt): i have breasts too, but mine are little.

me: yes, yours are little...

p: and yours are big.

me: yes, mine are bigger... one day yours will be bigger too.

p: so i can feed my baby.

me: right, so you can feed your baby. that's what breasts are for.

scene: paige continues to poke aunt suzie's breasts.

me: you know paige, not all women like it when you touch their breasts.

p: why?

good question.

23 park street lane

2009-03-31T14:58:00.034-04:00

my grandmother turned 87 last week, and so the lowells & poiriers (and collins) of vt made the mass exodus to our homeland, our mecca -- 23 park street, malone, ny. g'ma l. and uncle mark had made the 45 minute trip from potsdam and mom's turkey was pretty much ready to be sliced into when we all arrived. g'ma l., ever the practical one, as my readers already well know, doesn't accept gifts well. however, she didn't hesitate to take the remainder of her decadent triple chocolate mocha mousse cake home for the actual big day (we celebrated on sunday, 3/22; her bday was actually wednesday, 3/25).

with bellies full of turkey & mousse cake, and not much to do but sit around on the love seats chatting the hours away until we all had to make our mass exodus back to our homes away from home, the obvious choice was to see what treasures we could find hiding up in the attic.

(please notice new leg warmers)

baxter & paige have taken to fashion shows lately. mainly, i think it's their stalling technique for going to bed. they like to show off which pjs they've chosen for their nocturnal musings and they like there to be a rather dramatic unveiling. (i have no idea who started this ;). so, not lost on the 2 and 4 year olds was the concept of showing off an outfit, but the first items on display (see exhibit a), certainly were lost on baxter and paige. what do they know about '80s fashion? oh, what they don't know, margaret lowell could fill a book, or at least a unitard snowsuit! neon colors only of course!
exhibit a (above)

but the lowell sisters had some key '80s fashion style of their own that they were dying to reveal. i suspect that the youngest lowell sister had alterior motives (in order to secure the love of her beau, she needed him to see, understand, and accept her roots, however tafetta-laced & nylon-silked they are).

trying on old prom dresses is supposed to be fun. trying on old prom dresses is supposed to be fun? why, when i was 16 years old did i think i was fat? why, when those dresses zipped so easily up my back? and today? -- well, notice that those pictures are only taken from the front (exhibit b).

exhibit b:

(prom may '94 and rick, my very first love)

after the fashion show, it was time to look through our old halloween costumes and stuffed animal collections. and that's when B & P got in on the action (exhibit c). what's better than their mom's old tutus? their aunt's micky & minnie dolls and pound puppies!

exhibit c:

(they were already in their pjs for the ride home)

when my parents celebrated their 25th wedding anniversary, g'ma l. & g'ma t. got so into it that they unwrapped their mother-of-the-groom and mother-of-the-bride dresses and surprised us all by walking out arm in arm. g'ma l.'s zipped up, but she couldn't breathe, and g'ma t. wasn't able to show us her back. i've got to get to work if i am to wear that shiny burgundy bridesmaid dress for jennie & derek's silver celebration. the trip down memory lane felt a little melancholy to me. when i told g'ma l. that we had big plans for her 90th -- a cruise for the whole family -- she told me she hoped she wouldn't be around for it. my grandma is active and leads an enriching life -- she takes classes and plays bridge and still attends ski club meetings and ornament exchanges. she goes out to see movies and she reads and she loves suzy ormand! she has an opinion about just about everything and is not afraid to let people know how she feels. she goes to star lake in the summer and remembers all of our birthdays and is there for all of our celebrations. she's been on her own since my granfather died in 1999, but it seems to me that she lives a full life. i hope that when i am that old, i will take happiness in seeing my family grow up around me and that i'll feel frustration but fascination in seeing the changes in my world -- technologies and presidents and foreign relations. i suppose i might also feel lonely and bored, especially when my friends and siblings and loved ones are dying around me. maybe memory lane isn't that much fun when you are always living on it. i told g'ma l. that we want her to be around and that there's still so much for her to see and do. but if she doesn't feel that way, then what are we to do? i guess we continue doing what we do, which includes putting on silly old outfits and indulging her with rich desserts and the occassional gift that she doesn't really need and making her celebrate her 90 years with us on a cruise.

spring spring

2009-03-17T17:14:00.015-04:00

i, for one, am ready for spring. i’ve done my fair share of skiing, snow-shoeing, sledding, snow-ball fighting, windshield scraping, & bundling up in layers and layers. i’ve lost at least 3 pairs of gloves (or at least one half of said pairs), i’ve lost a scarf, a hat, and a beloved brooch, and i’ve sufficiently rubbed up against my sand & salted car enough to have turned my black down coat grey. one container of bag balm down and my hands still aren’t moisturized enough, not to mention my pallor! i’m tired of making fires and i’m tired of hibernating. last night i got stuck in my coat for 10 minutes before i could unsnag my zipper. let me out of this cave, dammit!

oh, have i got the fever. the spring cleaning, cabin fever, wanna plant, wanna run fever.

bring on the sunshine. bring on the warm weather and the barbequeing. bring on baseball season and biking!

march is not one of my favorite months; in fact, march is my worst month. it's long -- the longest a month can be -- 31 days, and oh so long after the short 28 day love month. march is grey and dull and warm, but then cold. it's a tease, and i hate it. usually a march vacation is the cure for me, but no vacation looms on my impoverished horizon.

however, my recent weekend was the perfect cure for me and for anyone else who has the fever. i highly suggest following the below steps for maximum march satisfaction.

pre-step: set clocks ahead way earlier than we have in the past. enjoy daylight till 7 pm!

step 1: pay library fines and take out new exciting titles that promise to rivet.

step 2: trip to home depot for supplies.

step 3: trip to hannaford's for supplies.

step 4: lime juice, cane sugar, bacardi, limes, mint, sugar, ice, spring cocktail glasses = MOJITOS. there's nothing like a limey drink to make you feel like spring.

step 5: jimmy buffet concert in your DVD player. open windows, turn on heat, wear your swimgear & crocs, turn up volume (until older lady neighbor asks you to turn it down).

step 6: get all dirty with soil and seeds.

step 7: after sun sets, shut windows, put sweatshirt on, and continue to sip fruity drink until you fall asleep.

step 8: wake up and go spring skiing with only a ponytail & sunglasses (plus clothing, duh) -- helmet & goggles not necessary!

monday will be hard, but friday comes quickly enough, especially if you partake of step 4 each night... (just kidding about 3 of the things i wrote up above).

it will be april before we know it kids!

sweepin' the clouds away

2009-01-29T13:13:00.010-05:00

i have a different ringtone for each of the very special people in my life. eva has the b-52's "the deadbeat club," julie and tim have flight of the conchords' "the humans are dead," mom & dad have "we are family," paul has jimmy buffet's "son of a sailor," and another ex has bright eyes' "first day of my life." danielle has beyonce's "single ladies," jess has a latin beat, and tracy has the sex and the city theme song. michael jackson's "thriller" is reserved for anyone work related. and the sesame street theme song is reserved for when the lowell/poirier household gives me a ring.

when i first showed off my new purple phone to my niece & nephew they were thrilled with the choice of their ringtone and sang along: "sunny days, sweepin' the clouds away, on my way to where the air is sweet, can you tell me how to get, how to get to sesame street!" now whenever they see my phone, they want to hear the ring.

for christmas i bought the lowell/poirier clan tickets to see sesame street live at the flynn. earlier this week, i caught their party of 5 in the lobby just as they were about to head to their seats. baxter had his ticket in hand and asked me if he had good seats. i assured him that i didn't work at the flynn for nothing, and that yes, he'd be able to see oscar the grouch up close and personal (row 4 -- thanks AJ). the show was full of dancing monsters and silly antics that had the 2-7 year old audience in an uproar. there were phantom fluorescent feet dancing on the black lit stage, and of course, there was cookie monster and elmo, big bird and grover, bert and ernie, and zoe and rosita.

a 7 pm kid show is a late show. to have an intermission at a kids show is cruel and unusual punishment for parents, and this intermission was particularly torturous. just as the curtains closed on act i, two men walked down the aisles carrying huge elmo face balloon bouquets that threatened to sweep the men to the rafters. not only did every child in the theater see these balloons -- every child in the theater wanted one of these $8 balloons! the oh so purposeful light-up twirly elmo hand-held gadgets were in high demand as well. somehow jennie and derek escaped the show with cash firmly in their pockets.

jennie called me later to thank me for the gift and said that the best part of the night was watching paige dancing in her seat, waving and screaming hello to elmo and cookie at the top of her lungs. it brought tears to her eyes, which in turn brought tears to mine.

the next day, a stray elmo balloon and a lost light-up gadget found their way into my office, another perk of my job. later that evening, baxter and paige were momentarily dumbfounded when a big balloon-headed elmo walked into their kitchen singing "la la la la, la la la la, elmo's world" until they realized it was merely their aunt suzie using a balloon for her face. paige's laughter couldn't be contained, and baxter commented on his good fortune that "that kid" lost his light-up toy.

ah, sunny days. those kids sure do chase my clouds away.

on social utilities

2009-01-24T10:00:00.003-05:00

i've got writer's block. i've been thinking about this post on social utilities ever since my life turned upside down and inside out because of a blogger.

i tried this last week and it started something like this...

i've gone and dated myself. i haven't posted since last year (why does this joke never get old?) baxter & paige don't get it yet, but that didn't stop them from running to give me a hug and a kiss goodnight since they weren't going to see me till next year (which was the next day).

speaking of jokes, what do you get when you cross a white chicken with a black cow? brown chicken brown cow. say it really fast and it sounds like a bad '70s movie. bax & paige can deliver this one, but they still don't get it. what do you get when you cross a red chicken with a yellow cow? orange chicken orange cow? not quite.

so, social utilities. facebook, gchat, AIM, texting, twitter. i've been thinking about social utilities. and old people. and the way they used to do it in the old days. and about a recent frustrating conversation held between my father, his mother, and me.

me: look, dad, see, i am friends with our cousin, your aunt's grandchild. see, there's your aunt and your cousin, and their kid, and pictures of the race they ran back in september.

dad: oh, yes, i talked to muriel on the phone and heard about that.

g'ma l: wait, what? how do you have terin's computer on your computer? how are you on her computer?

oh boy.

later on my dad reads my blog outloud to my grandmother, not only like she is deaf (ok, she kind of is), but also like she is blind (he describes every picture), a 3-year old, and also an alien who has never visited our land before. well, maybe it sometimes feels that way to her. when i tried to show her how to toggle between 2 pages, she gave up and didn't understand how i was moving the little arrow. it does seem unlikely that running your finger across a flat pad would move an arrow...

this is the same grandma who was tickled to be able to purchase a cute pair of tennis sneakers over the internet. the same grandma who declared "no gifts" for her this past holiday season, which makes it a fun challenge to think of something that she'll actually deem useful and worthwhile. i still feel a personal triumph every time she mentions how much she loves the fleece blanket that i made for her. anyway, that was an aside, but thinking about it, i realize how happy i am that i still get to write "is" statements about my grandma.

someone once warned me that while a 2nd or 3rd life may be lived on the internet, the 1st one still exists. i wanted to heed the advice, i just didn't really understand what it was. i've heard from another person (not julie's ex-boyfriend, the stiff) that blogs are self-indulgent and a blogger's attempt to portray the image of herself that she wants people to see, not necessarily equal to her actual self. and i've heard from yet others that the only way they know what i'm up to is by reading my blog. i am vain enough that although i haven't written in over a month, i still check my blog counter daily. i apologize to those 15 something people who check my blog every day -- even this post is not going to really update you on what's going on with me.

anyway, my thoughts are nowhere near cogent, but what i'm trying to tell my readers is that i feel like a fake, and i've lost my voice, i've lost a friend, and facebook and blogging no longer hold the excitement that they once did.

my blogger boyfriend is now my ex-boyfriend and we aren't facebook friends anymore, nor are we allowed to comment on each other's blogs. i apologize to him and to others for going public on these so-called social utilities. perhaps they should be named social inutilities. communication is best face to face when what is real is right in front of you, not a fairy-tale dream in cyberspace.

see what i mean about writer's block?

speaking of turkeys...

2008-12-02T02:08:00.014-05:00

this 22 lb. fresh, organic, local, $60 turkey went into my oven at 7:30 am. it got up earlier than me. (my mom stuffs turkeys superfast).

these helper turkeys make yummy crescent rolls.

this big brown turkey spilled hot turkey grease all over my dad. luckily someone was there to hold his pant leg away from his leg. sadly, the little pink turkey girl took a digger and slipped on the not-so-successfully-mopped-up turkey grease.

this little turkey only ate a little bit of everything because her tummy wasn't feeling very well. though, when it was "time for dessert time," she still wanted whipped cream, but not on her pie, on the side, thank you very much.

this turkey thought his kid wine had too much spice and was stirring out the fizz.

this momma turkey is still a very pregnant momma turkey. the littlest baby turkey is not ready to come out of the oven yet. (don't worry people, that's kid wine).

el árbol generoso

2008-11-12T18:46:00.011-05:00

speaking of trees...this is mr. tree and he wishes me a good day every day on my way to work, and i thank him. some people think i'm crazy for talking to and naming a tree. some people think i am cute & quirky.
this is my favorite tree in the whole wide world. it is somewhere between here and my favorite place in the whole wide world. i never know when it is coming up, i only know it when i see it. some people won't humor me and stop to take a picture. some people will.
the story "the giving tree" by shel silverstein makes some people cry. it doesn't make me cry, but it does make me sad. it makes me sad that that little boy never stopped for a moment to look outside of himself to see what a wonderful gift was being offered to him. it makes me sad that the tree was so selfless that she gave and gave of herself until there was nothing left to give. as often as i read it, and as much as i want that little boy to thank the tree, or perhaps to refuse to cut down her limbs & her trunk, just once, it never happens. what is the lesson shel? to give of yourself freely if you love someone so much, even if that means sacrificing your own happiness to make the one you love happy? to realize what gifts you are being handed and not take them for granted?

the best part is the beginning -- the innocent love between a boy and his tree -- but it goes downhill from there when money and life get in the way. why must love and life be so complicated?

... i was talking about trees, wasn't i?

like a virgin

2008-10-26T21:00:00.014-04:00

madonna popped my cherry. um, i mean, i popped my madonna cherry. er, um, yeah, i mean, i saw madonna for my first time!

what was meant to be an outing for the ladies of leisure became a sisters plus brother-in-law/husband plus children/niece/nephew boston extravaganza (by no means any less or more pleasurable than an outing with eva and tracy).

because tracy was broke and eva has strict requirements for her viewing pleasure (see exhibit A),

exhibit A: we were seated in section 327, yellow, nosebleeds #9-12. eva ended up buying $$ tickets in montreal where she was seated around oh section j, blue, #17.

because derek has a list of artists he would pay inordinate sums of money to see (see exhibit B),

exhibit B: and because one day jennie was rocking out to borderline, and decided that she must see madonna too, jennie, derek, suzanne (me), julie, baxter, paige, and cocoa left for boston on thursday, October 16 right around noon time. (we were supposed to leave at 11, but the lowell/poirier clan wasn’t quite ready (surprise, surprise) and we had to rock out to a few songs from the immaculate collection before we headed out).

after a therapeutic stop at target (incredibly i only spent $50), we arrived at our posh suite in burlington, MA. i donned my madonna ensemble, made julie put on some girlie earrings, and made jennie put on an about-to-be-baby-mama cleavage-revealing top (sorry jen, the grey t-shirt was just not going to cut it for gussying up to go out to see the original material girl herself). derek even tried on the blue feather boa i’d brought for him, but opted not to wear it on the T. marta, super-babysitter (by no means any less or more superb than ashley, the super-babysitter), arrived, and the adult siblings were off!

what could have been a disastrous wrong turn and what was a deathly slow T-ride (hampered by a misplaced garbage can?), turned out to be fine, and we weren’t late! i was a bit grumpy (like the grumpy that a person might get when she is climbing up the steep steep, what seems to be perpetual, and actually is never-ending staircase, that is camel’s hump), until we were finally seated in our nosebleed seats (eva, you might be on to something – read her blog about her night & see her close-up pics here). we were to the side of the stage, and although screens were there for our viewing pleasure, the images that were being projected were backwards for us, since we were actually behind the screen. fortunately, i’m an excellent sdrawkcab reader. i was still feeling grumpy and like i’d been duped by citicard's promise that they had “special," pre-sale madonna sticky & sweet tour tickets. again, it all turned out in the end – we had a neat behind-the-scenes vantage point, got to see madge get her mic fixed, going down to the depths of the pit on her descending platform, and got to see her get in place and practice some moves before her rotating screen was turned toward the audience.

the show was one big ADHD-riddled person’s dream -- lights, music, videos, dancers, props, jump ropes, cars, pianos, ascending & descending platforms, costume changes, and of course madonna herself, who actually went from having no bangs to bangs. I don’t know how she did it (though magical bobbie pins could be the answer). madonna danced with an illusion of justin timberlake (i’d like to reiterate how grateful i am to him for bringing sexy back), sang with the piped-in vocals of kanye west, tricked us by switching her image with britney’s, and made a shameless plug for voting for obama, and I think kabbalah, though i couldn’t be sure because the 85 degree temperature (which she insists her venues keep the temp set to) was slightly frying my brain.

i could go on and on about how madonna jump-roped and double-dutched in high heel wedged sneakers, how she shook her fanny in old 80s style exercise shorts (see exhibit C), how her voice kind of trembled in a not-so-good way during borderline (i never said she was a good singer), how she is totally hot and buff and i’m not sure, but am almost positive that she’s had some plastic surgery, how we danced and danced and screamed (but didn’t cry), but i think you’re getting the picture (unfortunately, i can’t show you because they wouldn’t let me bring my camera in, though there were plenty of people who were filming with their cell-phones. you can be sure to catch those quality vids on youtube.)

exhibit C:

this was the set list with a few details from yours truly:

~intro/candy shop: this is where the stage rotated and madonna was revealed sitting in a queen’s throne holding a scepter and wearing white laced black f*ck me boots.~beat goes on
~human nature

~vogue: this is where we put our hands up to our face to make kind of like a picture frame around our heads.
~video interlude – die another day
~into the groove: this is where we screamed the loudest.
~heartbeat
~borderline: this is where i felt slightly embarrassed for madonna.
~she’s not me: this is where 4 different women rose from the platforms dressed as different madonna-era madonnas – there was the lacy white bride, the cone boobed voguer, the marilyn monroe hot-pink dressed, white-gloved material girl madonna, and the pin-striped suit, short-haired express yourself madonna.
~music
~video interlude – rain/here comes the rain again
~devil wouldn’t recognize you
~spanish lesson
~miles away
~la isla bonita/lela pala tutedoli doli (live interlude - romanian folk song)
~you must love me: this is when a piano rose from the floor and madonna was laying on it in a huge black cape that revealed itself to be lined in hot pink when she finally flung it off of herself. this is also when I asked julie if this was the song from that argentina movie she was in.
~video interlude – get stupid (about saving the planet): this is when she asked boston if they’d registered to vote and told them to vote for obama.
~4 minutes
~like a prayer: this is when she let us sing.
~ray of light
~hung up: this is when the building started bouncing.

~give it to me (finale): this is when she left and the lights came on. i can’t believe she didn’t do an encore.

so, i’m no longer a madonna virgin. the highlight of my night could quite possibly be when i was recognized as the material girl. one, of many, gay guys cat-called out to me, “it’s madonna!” I guess my outfit was convincing enough for him. i struck a pose.

crème brûlée revisited

2008-10-23T18:00:00.000-04:00

long ago, i wrote a post about derek’s new blow-torch and the about-to-be-newly-released ben & jerry’s flavors. i raved about how much i loved crème brûlée to my friends and family, because, let’s be honest, you handful are the only ones who read this blog, or so i thought. to my delight, someone else, a stranger, actually commented on that particular post – a one bungalow benchly commented:

"When B&J releases this new ice cream, which I must say I'm probably more excited about than I should ever let on in public, they should have Audrey Tautou from Amelie do a demonstration on how to eat it properly. "

not only was i thrilled to have a comment from, and a reader in, a stranger, i was also quite excited to have a comment from this particular stranger. i had had a blog crush on mr. benchly since way back when, when he was blogging on live journal and I was networking on friendster. i came upon his profile accidentally (more or less, if you don’t count me typing in a search for eligible bachelors aged 25-30 within 20 miles of the 05401 zip code). immediately i was struck by his funny and cute pictures with captions that made me laugh out loud. i read about his activities, his thoughts, and his life, including his daily commutes to the evil empire (his former place of work), his family – mama benchly, papa benchly, sisters 1 & 2, and nieces #1-5, his budding relationship with a woman with freckles, and his world of friends and family with their own unique nicknames. i wanted to be part of this person’s world who seemed so much like me – liberal-minded, family-oriented, intelligent, sensitive, an incredible writer (not that i would say that’s like me), funny & fun, and a bit self-deprecating at times, but i didn’t think that he would be interested in little old me. i was hooked and mourned that missed opportunity for at least two days before i got back on the horse and joined match.com. lo and behold, whose dating profile should I come across, but a one bungalow benchly, who had not been active in 2 weeks, the same amount of time that he’d been seeing the woman with freckles. now i was convinced i'd missed my soulmate by a hair.

i moved on and i met paul (we all know I don’t hide anything – names, pictures, dates, places…), but still checked up on mr. benchly’s blog every once in awhile. when paul and i broke up for those 4 months, i checked in on benchly to see if he had any brothers (he doesn’t), and that’s when i shamelessly plugged my somethingsomething blog to him. i confessed that i had been reading for the past couple of years and that i even had a link to his blog on my page. he was flattered and that was that, or so i thought.

back in june, mr. benchly walked by me in front of old navy, and although he was too bashful to say hello, thankfully he wasn’t too shy to email me that we were no longer strangers, rather we were “Burlington Residents Who Walked By Each Other The Other Day.” i asked him why the heck he hadn’t said hello and that began our friendship. our daily emails back and forth became small books and i started to miss hearing his thoughts on the weekends. we talked about the books and movies we love and hate, our families, funny stories from our pasts, our relationships, our frustrations with our relationships, politics – anything and everything because it was safe to be internet friends.

i feel bad about this part. i knew he was in a relationship. i knew i was in a relationship. but i couldn’t help but think about how well he matched me. and i had a sneaking suspicion that he felt the same way. the guilty part goes like this: we decided to meet to see if there would be a spark – there was, he made me a mixed CD, i made him a mixed CD, we decided we wouldn’t communicate for a month and see our respective relationships through. we ended our respective relationships. we went on our first date. and then we went on our second date. and by now i’ve lost track of how many dates we’ve been on.
the timing isn’t exactly the greatest. but the person is. little did i know that when benchly made that comment way back when about audrey tautou being the spokesperson for crème brûlée, that I should have responded, “no, i think you would make a better representative…” he’s got a fragile shell that hides something oh so sweet underneath and i really can’t get enough of him.

it smells as sweet

2008-10-01T21:55:00.012-04:00

suzanne spataro, suzanne potter, suzanne grant (as in hugh), suzanne perry, suzanne ripski, suzanne mcgregor (as in ewan), suzanne marco, suzanne benchly. all girls do it -- if they like the guy a lot, if they like the guy a little -- it's as reflexive as the literal rubber mallet on the knee cap.

i once told a friend (the future mrs. ripski's husband, in fact), that i wasn't sure if i would take my future husband's last name or if i would keep my own. women's lib aside or not, suzanne lowell does have a certain 30-year old familiar ring to it. mr. ripski scoffed at me and reminded me of my hopeless romantic self, and that if i ever finally did fall skull over achilles, i would most definitely, surely take my husband's last name. he was willing to bet on it.

the jury is still out on that one, as it is on the lowell/poirier child #3's name (ETA: 11/22).
never traditional, my older sister jennie (lowell) and her husband derek ("i'm not a manny" poirier), decided that should their first child be a boy, he would take my father's last name (because my father was one of two boys, and uncle mark has never married). i suppose they figured that baxter elliot could carry on the lowell name. i always meant to ask them why they thought their son, who would most likely be raised as liberally and non-traditionally as his liberal and non-traditional parents raised him, would pass his name on to his future wife (or husband...) -- wouldn't he follow their lead and match with a woman (or man) who was liberal enough to want to keep her (his) name?

(M.S. (mid script): my grandfather created the last name lowell for himself and his wife. slight anti-semitism in his neighborhood, paired with the inability of the town to correctly pronounce lowenthall, convinced one milton lowenthall to christen his young family, lowell.)

in jennie & derek's heads, if the first boy was to be named lowell, then the first girl would be named poirier. and thus, a poirier, paige elizabeth became.we are all waiting with bated breath to find out if the newest member of our family will be girl lowell or boy poirier. we're all just hoping it's a baby.

with all of these name possibilities flying around, i'm just glad that i get to be aunt suzie who is still searching for uncle suzie.

"always remember, there is nothing worth sharing
like the love that let us share our name"

"murder in the city," the avett brothers

tiabo kristi

2008-09-28T10:16:00.006-04:00

e tia nako vietnam rarou kristi.kristi -- ti uringko! taiaoka, oki ngkai. ke oki rimwi. au tangira ke iai kamau iroum.
tekeraoi n t mwananga, ke!

happy birthday julie

2008-09-28T10:13:00.001-04:00

yesterday she was 28. today she is 28.
julie marie lowell, born september 6, 1980.

we've always celebrated her birthday at camp. sometimes labor day weekend falls on her birthday, sometimes it doesn't. but there is always birthday cake. even when she's not there.
next family birthday: it's a mystery. either jennie's on 11/18 or baby poirier/lowell -- due date, 11/22.

happy birthday baxter

2008-09-19T15:27:00.008-04:00

yesterday he was tree.today he is four.

god loves a terrier

2008-08-31T23:00:00.006-04:00

the lowells are schnauzer people. in 1995 we bought our first schnauzer. we named her pepper, and there wasn't enough of her cute pudgy little body to go around. mom and dad thought it would be great fun to breed her and have more schnauzer puppies. (i thought this was a horrible idea and cried and yelled at my parents for taking her to get raped. their claims that it was in her nature disgusted me, and i still believe to this day that sex and pregnancy changed my sweet innocent little pepper). but the mating took. and pepper had 6 pudgy little puppies, 5 girls, and 1 boy. the boy was the runt, so we appropriately named him wilbur (and if you've never seen charlotte's web, perhaps you should update your netflix queue). wilbur was so teeny that one fateful day, pepper smushed him. julie counted & recounted, but only counted 5 puppies, until she finally found him, under pepper. wilbur was barely breathing, but my dad got out his stethoscope and my medically inclined parents performed "mouth to snout" resuscitation. though slightly brain dead, he's the sweetest little pig. the cutest female became jennie and derek's first baby. they were living in hershey, PA, and consequently, cocoa was christened.
one christmas, derek surprised jennie with a second schnauzer puppy, duncan, and then there were four.

i wanted a dog. but i was going to break away from my famliy's trend and forge my own path. and i did. when i was in the peace corps i found myself a pudgy little black mutt, koobe (the kiribati word for coffee), who grew into a black lab look-a-like who thought he was a schnauzer lap dog. i tried my hardest to bring him home with me, but the doggods were not in our favor and that's too sad of a story to tell.when i returned i searched the pounds and the humane society for my dog. i knew that he or she would come to me and that i would just know when the dog and the time were right. i searched and searched but found no doggie soul mate. and then i gave up the search with the tiniest flame of hope still lit in the back of my heart.
derek's parents, lynn & allen had taken up the hobby and side-business of dog-breeding. their spacious farm offered much land on which their cockerspaniels, poodles, schnauzers, cockapoos, & schnoodles could run.
on another fateful day, one schnauzer was born to them with only 3 legs. the umbilical cord had wrapped around her hind right leg and cut off the circulation so much so, that her leg had fallen off (who knew dogs even had umbilical cords?)! lynn & allen couldn't sell her, so they offered her to jennie and derek, who declined because they had their hands full with cocoa, duncan, and baby baxter on the way. next she was offered to me. the time was right, the dog was right (even though i thought i didn't want a schnauzer), and then there were five. ella was meant to be mine. thank dogness she is.with five schnauzers, the "guess the schnauzie" game, in which a blind-folded family member was on the clock to guess which schnauzer she was touching, was born. it was really quite easy -- duncan had cropped ears, cocoa had a cyst on her side, pepper was the licker, wilbur has the softest fur, and well, ella only has 3 legs!
sadly, we lost our duncan to cancer. luckily (some might say), another terrier waltzed his way into our lives. oliver was julie's "rescue" dog -- who rescued whom, i'm still not sure. the poor wheaton had spent the first 11 months of his life neglected in a cage, left for hours at a time. he had abandonment issues, to say the least, and still gets nervous and pees on things when julie starts to pack. (i know i'm not really one to talk when it comes to a dog's nervous bodily habits). i think both of our doggie soul mates have come a long way though.

ella just turned four -- i think celebrating her with a blog post and a little whip cream treat is exactly what she wanted.

happy birthday baby.

an ode to summer's end (part III of III): star lake revisited

2008-08-30T23:58:00.001-04:00

ever since I can remember my family has been celebrating labor day and the close of summer at my grandparents' log cabin on star lake in the middle of nowhere in the adirondacks. usually we are bundled in jeans and sweatshirts around an inside fire, but in the last few years, global warming has provided us with a warm, sunny final weekend.

after an extended-birthday goodbye breakfast with uncle arthur in new jersey, our family started the 7 hour trek to our favorite place in the whole wide world.

TRAVEL INTERLUDE

jennie, derek, and the kids went on a special mission into the city to obtain the most coveted cupcakes in the world – magnolia’s cupcakes. jennie and the kids wanted the cupcakes. derek just wanted to use the GPS that he’d “borrowed” from his parents (D, does borrowing become stealing once you’ve had the item over a month?). once said cupcakes were obtained, back and forth text messages went like this:

from D’s cell: cupcakes! (3 dozen of them)
from suz & julie: magnolia’s cupcakes got all the bomb frosting.
from d’s cell: GPS rules! we are invincible!
from suz & Julie: i prefer mapquest, but google maps is the best. true. double true.
from D’s cell: cupcakes in mouth – I mean hand – with this accompanying picture:from d’s cell: 90 bucks later mission cupcake successful. sweet – with this accompanying picture:from suz & Julie: double sweet.

sadly, jennie and derek had never seen the snl skit/song to which julie and i were referring. please educate yourself now about "lazy sunday" and understand why magnolia’s has all the bomb frosting.

mom & dad headed up to saratoga to pick up pepper, wilbur, and oli at the doggie spa.

jennie, derek, and the kids headed to jeremy and steph’s (derek’s brother and sister-in-law) in schuylerville to pick up ella and cocoa. (if you read derek’s blog, you’ll hear his take on magnolia’s and on dealing with ella’s catastrophic escape).

julie and i continued north, meeting up with mom and dad to transfer oliver to his mother’s waiting arms, though he gave her the silent treatment for the first 24 hours (and even slept on my feet & couch the first night. oh was he mad at her for abandoning him for a week).

we all stopped for pizza an hour from our mecca. we were going stir-crazy by that point. i attempted spelling pizza backwards and drew a large pepperoni slice, though my backwards/rearview mirror writing skills are lacking, and mom & dad only knew that i was trying to send them a message, though they had no idea what AZZIP meant.

the 3 car caravan eventually made it. the crackle and pop of the stone gravel driveway under our tires was like a sigh of relief.

TRAVEL INTERLUDE COMPLETE

it's hard to put the experience of being at star lake into words. it's like how you feel when you've finally come home after a long trip. it's like putting on that favorite too-big sweater that has been in storage all summer. it's like cuddling up with a good book on a rainy day. coziness & contentedness all rolled into one.
not much has changed about star lake. the marlin fish is still on the wall above the dining room table. the bear skin, deer heads, and moose head still overlook our evening antics in the living room. the old-fashioned jars of toxic fire-extinguishing chemicals still sit in their orbs. the kitchen still can only fit 2 people comfortably (2 and a half is pushing it jennie). the kitchen is open for breakfast from 6-8:30 per grandma's rules, and lunch is served promptly at 12 when the noon siren goes off (the local fire station lets the whole town know when it is noon, and then the lowell posse of dogs reminds everyone with their howling). dinner is served at about 6, and if you want a snack in between you've got to sneak it. even baxter knows where the good graham crackers are kept, and since grandma's hearing is going, we've even gotten away with popping a bag of microwave popcorn right in front of her. after dinner there's always dessert and after dessert there's almost always s'more.

our log cabin at star lake has not gotten any bigger, but our family has. grandma still has her bedroom and mom and dad still have theirs, but paige and baxter have taken jennie, julie, and my place upstairs in the loft. derek and jennie now sleep outside in a tent and julie, ella, oli, and i claim the 2 couches. uncle mark still gets the boat house, and unexpected visitors bring their own tents. lord knows that one bathroom cannot accommodate all of those guests, and the toilet has overflowed on more than one occasion to prove it (we managed to keep that flood from grandma as well). there used to be a plaque in the bathroom with this sage motto:

"in these lovely isles of sun and fun, we never flush for number one."

once the guest numbers became too large, and grandma made the switch from well to town water, that plaque resigned its place of honor and we can actually flush every time now. grandma's toilet however, was still not keeping up (or down as the case may be). uncle mark managed to switch the old one out with the monster "toto" brand (again, without grandma being the wiser), and we have yet to have a problem.

there's much more i could say about camp, many more stories to recount, and pictures to share, but camp is my family's sacred place and something i don't share with just anyone. you have to be invited to camp. and when you come, you fall in love with it.

years ago, mom and dad bought the land behind and to the left of our log cabin with dreams to expand & build. plans have been slow-going. mom and dad, this is my plea: so that we can enjoy many more years of sun & fun in our lovely isles, please please lay the floor & the tiles!

an ode to summer's end (part II of III): celebrating 90 years of great art

2008-08-30T23:58:00.000-04:00

after jules and i strapped her bike on the trunk, we were off to east brunswick, NJ to meet up with mom, dad, jennie, derek, baxter, & paige for our great uncle arthur’s 90^th birthday.

arthur, my father’s uncle, (his mother’s brother), used to wow his grandnieces, by pretending to eat salamanders. he held them up by their little tails and dangled their wriggling bodies above his mouth, lowering them just so that it really did look like he was eating them. i think he delighted in our squeals of disbelief and disgust just as much as we did. we nicknamed him uncle anteater (we knew he wasn’t eating ants, and we knew he wasn’t an anteater. i think it had something to do with the children’s book character arthur the anteater. uncle salamander-eater just didn’t have the same ring).

arthur neuhauser was born on august 27, 1918. he was best friends with one milton “mickey” lowenthall, whom he introduced to his sister judith, my future grandmother. he met and fell in love with his soulmate rosalyn before he was shipped over to europe during world war II. my great uncle will talk and talk for hours about most things, but never the war. don’t even ask him about it. all you’ll get out of him is memories of his dog, gorgan, a black mutt, whom he smuggled home. and then you’ll hear the story of how judy and mickey lost him while they were dog-sitting. poor gorgan was never seen again, and poor arthur’s heart still has a teeny crack from the loss. arthur and his 3 children (kenny, mitchell, and claudia) were to suffer an even greater loss when cancer stole their rosalyn in 1980. in his wallet, arthur kept a newspaper cutout of a quote of the day for years: “of all of god’s creatures, the goose and the gander mate for life,” until he finally gave it and his porcelain goose and gander statues to his daughter. to this day, arthur has been without his goose, or another mate, though aunt ros’ 2x3 framed picture accompanies him whenever he travels and framed photographs of her beautiful smile fill his room.

arthur worked at the NY times as an editor for 40 years. he also edited books, and even was thanked/mentioned in martin gilbert’s historic account of world war II – he found a very big mistake. arthur has a penchant and a talent for word games, crossword puzzles, and cryptics. he lies awake at night assigning number values to each letter of the alphabet (A=1, B=2…Y=25, Z=26) and attempts to find 100 point words. he’s actually found some. and then he reverses the value and starts over.

arthur’s optometrist was also his next door neighbor and good friend who was practicing out of his basement with out of date equipment. i forget how the story goes, but it has something to do with his optometrist never testing for glaucoma, or his glaucoma testing machine being broken, or something like that (arthur could fill in the details). unfortunately, his glaucoma was discovered too late. his sight, though not his keen mind, has faltered ever since. in his old age, he’s had to learn about the photocopier so that he can blow up his crossword puzzles and he’s befriended the local librarians who save him the best large print books. he has magnifying glasses of varying magnifications by his reading chair, and was recently gifted a reading machine from the VA.

i started developing a deeper and closer relationship with arthur when my grandfather died in 1999. my grandfather was an incredible man, but a quiet & stoic one who came across as foreboding and hard-to-approach to his grandchildren. arthur shared stories about his and micky’s childhood and early adulthood, and helped me understand what kind of man my grandfather really was. i am forever grateful to arthur for providing me a glimpse of my family’s history and of my heritage. not only do i understand my grandparents better because of him, but i understand my father better too. i am also grateful to my uncle for being a surrogate father for my father. i know how much dad cherishes his weekly conversations with arthur.

arthur has gone above and beyond the duty of great uncle. i didn’t even know that great uncles felt a connection with their grandnieces, but arthur does (he even has a connection with his great grandniece, grandnephew and granddogs). he has always been supportive of my life and endeavors. when i was studying to be a teacher, arthur called for monthly updates. when i joined the peace corps he sent me monthly, typed missives, and even included packets of sweet-n-low, until the day the post office caught him and told him it was a big no-no to send white powders in the mail. until recently, when hip & sight problems became too much for him, arthur visited his north country fan club every summer. we thought claudia would never let him return after the time he fell head over keister off the dock at star lake, but we were able to keep his bumps and bruises hidden until they were healed properly enough to pass them off as a minor stumble. when he visits malone, he also has to visit the local funeral home to catch up with the director, for once he misdialed my parents’ number and had a 30 minute conversation with the man. with arthur, there is always a hilarious mishap waiting to happen. i’m sure pat (his daughter-in-law) will never forget the time she set the bowl of scrambled eggs meant to serve 14 in front of him and arthur dug into the bowl thinking it was all for him. when i stayed with him, i was slightly appalled when he made a fresh pot of coffee and then promptly put in the fridge to keep for the week. the next morning we had to warm our coffee up in the microwave. i know the man is going blind, but it’s always slightly comical to me when he pours himself a glass of orange juice, but actually pours himself a countertop of orange juice, and similarly when he dumps his glass of water into the sink, but actually pours it on the counter. it’s only comical because he himself brushes it off with laughter.

arthur recently moved into an assisted living home, a move away from the independent lifestyle to which he was accustomed. he seems to be doing well in the “institution” (as he refers to it).

claudia wanted to celebrate her father’s 90^th, but knew he wouldn’t want anything lavish. she asked him if it would be all right if his children and their families from the city came. he said fine. then she mentioned that kenny, pat and the kids would be coming from kentucky. he agreed to that as well. then she said that his sister wanted to come to, and that the north country contingency was waiting with bated breath for the OK. he kept agreeing until about 50 people were allowed to come to help him celebrate his great life.

the shindig was on a thursday evening at a chinese restaurant, no less. cocktails and fancy hors'devours of egg rolls, shrimp dumplings, scallion pancakes, & chicken & pork skewers were served, as well as an amazing meal. baxter wondered where the cake was, since it was a birthday party and all. he ran over to ask claudia about it and excitedly announced to the private room that there would indeed be cake. the north country table (read sugar fiends) cheered.

arthur’s cake was graced by the portrait that his now 16-year old granddaughter designed at the age of 6 – we’ve been celebrating great art ever since.

i’ve learned much from my great uncle arthur – above all, the love and importance of family. thank you uncle anteater.

an ode to summer's end (part I of III): krip-ahh-lu

2008-08-30T23:06:00.000-04:00

summer camps were over, i was newly single, and it was the perfect opportunity for what i like to refer to as the "self-indulgent-get-back-to-me" vacation. i booked three nights & four days at kripalu, a yoga retreat mecca in the berkshires. i planned to overlap with my old peace corps buddy amanda, and i also planned to meet up with julie at the end of her own "self-indulgent-get-back-to-me (her)" bike trip vacation. we both left on our respective retreats on monday morning -- she on her bicycle, and i in her prius (for better gas mileage). we were to meet on thursday afternoon at the end of her miles, and at the end of my ohms. a typical day at kripalu looks something like this:

6:30 am: yoga (something i planned to do every am, however my comfy bed kept me from executing any early morning sun salutations).

8:00 am: a delicious and healthy breakfast (silent in the morning to "ease into your day mindfully," unless you choose to eat outside, which we did). the food at kripalu is amazing -- all natural, whole foods, whole grains, totally organic & local. no coffee (i survived). the guest guide has this suggestion about how to make the most of one's dining experience:

"many people take advantage of their stay at kripalu to experiment with portion sizes and eating slowly and mindfully -- natural ways to eat less."

the only problem was that there was such a variety of food options, i had to try just a little bit of everything. i didn't mean to. i served myself a nice bowl of steaming oatmeal, added some dried wild blueberries and drizzled some fresh vermont maple syrup, and figured i'd be satiated. but further down the line was granola, dried fruit, and organic fat free soy yogurt. i had to have a little serving of that too. oh, and then there was the bowl of bananas, and the fresh nectarines, and the whole grain toast with that cool do-it-yourself conveyor belt toaster and all-natural peanutbutter... i was not, however, tempted to serve myself up a bowl of miso soup. miso soup for breakfast, you ask? i wondered too. miso is fermented soybean and it helps get your digestive juices flowing, easing you out of your fast, as do the aromatic herbs and spices that were available for sprinkling. not a fan of soup for breakfast? you can always whip yourself up a fresh batch of ginger juice... oh the things i learned at kripalu.10 am: hiking, biking, kayaking, lectures, workshops, relaxing, digesting, the beach, or whatever else you would like to do. amanda and i hiked every morning. we found our way through the apple orchard, past the wild flowers, to monk's pond & the burbank trail overlook, and we even managed to get lost. but life is about the journey, not the destination.12:00 pm: yoga. yoginis have their choice of gentle, moderate, or vigorous yoga sessions. always up for the challenge, amanda and i tried our hand at vigorous and were not disappointed in instructor ray crist, who encouraged us to get in tune with our inner jaguar, though reminded us that we were perfect just the way we are. ray, a shaman, a yogi, a reiki healer, dad, and quantum physicist, soon became our new hero. amanda bought his CD, we went to his class every day, sometimes twice, we passed him in the hall, and then whispered and giggled about how much we loved him, i went to his lecture on chakras and shamanism. (did i mention that kripalu is like sleep-away camp for adults? perhaps it was the fresh air that allowed that giddiness, silliness, happiness, and freedom to seep out of us like we were kids again).1:00 pm: lunch. more amazing food selections. but no dessert. at kripalu they are serious about healthy living and eating.
2:00 pm: anything your heart desires. my heart usually desired a nap, some conversation, a walk, and some reading. oh, and perusing the gift shop. other, more materially-endowed hearts desired massages, oil treatments, and ayurvedic wonders, but not for this tightly-budgeted yogini.4:30 pm: more yoga.

6:30 pm: more food. one night there was dessert -- vegan carob peanutbutter bars, so, not really sweet or melt-on-your mouth good, but it was dessert.

7:30: lecture or workshop or whatever you like. amanda and i went to a drumming workshop and played the djembes. the next night we showed up too early for a whole foods cooking demonstration and chatted our dread-locked chef up about love and marriage. we asked him what the recipe for success was (he'd been married 8 years). he told us that you always have to look at life as half full, that you had to have patience, and that, most importantly, you have to love yourself first before you can love someone else. he assured us that the capacity to love comes from within you first and advised that likewise, if a person didn't love themselves, it would be hard for a person to love them back. he compared relationships to a compost pile -- that juicy, not always so pleasant dirt would most definitely be turned up on you and your significant other, and you had to persevere through the unpleasantness to make the relationship richer. after the compost talk, we were definitely ready to eat the amazing pad thai he created. from chef aidan, i also learned that though everyone thinks yogurt and fruit is a good combo, it's actually not. the digestive enzymes that are produced to breakdown yogurt actually counteract the digestive enzymes that are produced to breakdown the fruit, so it takes twice as long to digest, or something like that. also: beans don't make you gassy -- chili, with beans, meat, cheese, & sour cream (multiple proteins) make you gassy. stop mixing your proteins people. i could go on and on about how eating local, in-season foods help prepare you for the coming season in terms of allergies and cold and sickness prevention. i could talk a little bit about a macrobiotic diet and the ayurvedic diet. but i won't. because i only caught the surface. fascinating. over my head. but fascinating.

7:30 pm continued: the last night i went to aforementioned lecture about chakras and shamanism. i could go on and on about that and even draw diagrams about the 7 chakras and their colors and how they align with your spine and nervous system, and how your chakras can get dirty and scarred and how you might need to visit a shaman to get them cleaned, or you can just do yoga. but i won't go on and on, because some of that stuff is fluffy stuff to me and a little too out there. but ray is also a quantum physicist and he witnessed a peruvian shaman perform some miracles, and though he didn't come right out and say it, there were potentially hallucinogenic herbs involved.

10 pm: spa time. amanda had heard that spreading honey all over yourself while in the sauna helped moisturize the skin as well as promote detoxification. we pilfered some honey from the dining hall and snuck it into the sauna, where "clothing is optional." women of all shapes and sizes were walking around in their birthday suits, just as naturally and normally as they would have in a shopping mall. i've been in locker rooms before, i don't know why this surprised me. after a week of reflection, i understand that what was different about this situation was how comfortable all the women were in their own skin and around each other, with no comparison or beauty contest of who was thinner or fatter, lumpier or smoother. the self-acceptance and centered calmness was almost palpable in the steam. conversation with naked strangers flowed and honey was shared. i'm not sure, but i think amanda and i may have been nicknamed "the honey girls." the next day we ran into one of the women with whom we'd shared a naked steam (at first i didn't recognize her with clothes on) and she put her arm out to us and exclaimed, "soft honey skin, girls." i worry that now there might be a sign in the dining hall and the sauna room reading "please do not take honey into the sauna."

(oh, and i can't forget to mention the incredibly beautiful tattoos -- trees, mountains, spirals, ohm symbols, sanskrit. i think the men wish they could be flies on the sauna walls too...)

11:00 pm: turning on of the cell phone, just to check to see if julie had safely camped for the night. final conversation with amanda. one night we went into the chapel to lay around on yoga bolsters and stare up at the vaulted ceiling. a woman walked in and asked if we minded if she played the piano. our conversation was accompanied by the gentle chords of pachelbel's canon. that's the thing about kripalu: things fall into place, a room is empty if you need it to be empty, chairs facing the mountains open up just as you are ready to sit down, the conversation you are having is exactly the one you need to be having, and the person you just met is exactly who you needed to encounter.

11:30 pm: deep sleep in a surprisingly comfortable and non-squeaky bunk bed, with non-snoring dorm mates (because we had to fill out a survey about our nocturnal noises), and a non-slamming, non-creaking door. shavasana, the resting pose, has never felt so sweet.
last day: by thursday morning julie's butt had had it (i wish i could show pictures of her bruises, but doubt she would appreciate that). i back-tracked 40 miles west to pick her up and we were off for part II (of III) of our vacation. as soon as i was on the road, kripalu was a distant memory of bliss, peace, and calm. only to be revisited in my yoga practice and in the quiet moments of my day.

ladies of leisure

2008-08-19T22:33:00.023-04:00

for eva gabor, suzanne monroe, & tracy "lyra" martin, the grueling summer months had been so devastatingly chaotic, that a much needed slumber party was deemed the only remedy. while ms. monroe was slaving away at summer camps, eva was busy canoodling with peter freyne, elton john, patrick leahy, and all of the seven daysies. down in warren, tracy was donating her own blood, sweat, and tears to help the fabulous phantom theater run smoothly. the ladies who lunch (on wednesdays, after tracy's tail-feather fluffing NIA dance class) had tragically not been together since the fateful day of July 3 (actually a thursday).

as is always the case with these multi-tasking, over-booked, talented women, one of them is inevitably late (and although, ms. monroe probably wouldn't like to point fingers, it's usually eva or tracy -- except for the aforementioned July 3rd lunch). the slumber party started at 7, but tracy was in the valley making sure the backwards dancers had their lemons in a row, so eva and suzanne gnoshed on fresh veggies from eva's garden & waited ever-so patiently, being ever-so careful not to dish any real dirt, until the red-haired bombshell arrived.in the meantime, ella, the 3-legged punk, surveyed eva's digs, and much to the dismay of ms. monroe, chased crawford (named as such for his signature cindy crawford mole) out of the house.

when tracy and her black, curly-haired doppelganger arrived, ella made it known to squid that the pink cat bed was most definitely, already spoken for. squiddy cowered in her mother's arms until ms. monroe scolded ella and attempted to instill jealousy by smothering the black miniature poodle in kisses. only the real marilyn can pull off that kind of trickery though. ella was pretty much a punk for the remainder of the evening. at least the ladies of leisure declared that while some owners are like their animals, ms. monroe and ella are nothing alike.

after the long overdue reunion, eating commenced, bubbly was poured, dancing & lip-synching ensued, and of course, the dirt was dished. oh how the men wished they were flies on the wall. after the catch-up details were all caught up on, the talk turned to more important things -- such as the dreams, goals, hopes, and upcoming plans of the ladies of leisure. if there had been male flies on the wall, they may have been disappointed that they weren't being talked about at all, a fact that went not unnoticed by the divas, a fact that was in fact cheered on and to which a drink was drunk.

at exclusive slumber parties such as this one, high quantities of calories must be consumed (inhaling is optional) & putting one's (elastic-waisted) pajamas on immediately is highly recommended. fortunately, the following day was eva's 35th birthday, so tracy's magical chocolate cake was in attendance as well as julie's magical cookie dough. (on a side note: the ladies of leisure have had some bad luck with dessert. at the christmas pj party at tracy's, they splurged on a mirabelle's special yuletide log that was too sweet even for their sweet-teeth. and at the last slumber party at ms. monroe's, oliver rudely ate the cake). the ladies of leisure have been dreaming & drooling for another ever since.
after the eating and the dress-up/character improv, tracy had consumed, imbibed, & expended way too much for her petite frame to handle, and left her friends for her dreams and to cuddle with squiddy (though she was really just over there on the couch).however, ms. monroe and ms. gabor were just getting started, and spent a few hours studying the mastery of marilyn monroe and jane russell in "diamonds are a girl's best friend." how those women twirled their little pinkies so is a mystery. and that "daddy" was ever a term of endearment for a suitor, well that just blew eva and suzanne away. after the movie, ms. monroe drifted off to sleep (at approximately 2:30 am), while eva fed her TV-monster till 4 am.

the morning after was spent drinking coffee, painting toe and fingernails, wishing eva a happy birthday with a special gift for her annual exodus to shelburne farms, and lamenting the fact that the ladies of leisure had to return to their constantly demanding lives. a next meeting was planned: a road trip to see madonna no less, and the hearts & souls of eva, suzanne, and tracy were refreshed and filled to the brim with love, hope, & friendship -- the slumber party had worked its magic.

please to enjoy some archives (christmas 2007 pj party with EMS, TWM, & SML):
and read eva's blog about it here.

almost

2008-08-07T23:22:00.001-04:00

a wise man once wrote me these words of advice:

hi suz,

your mom said you were down in the dumps. there are a lot of fishes in the sea and you can cast your hook and bait anytime. just think, summer is just around the bend and you can put on some bait (bikini) and go fishing. throw the ones you don't want back into the water. fish like to see bait all the time, and will keep going for it. short of knocking one over the head and dragging him home, i don't know what else to tell you.

~ one of the fishes (experienced though)

p.s. if i am not interested in the bait, i look elsewhere

FISH

i had to fire up my old toshiba 225CDS college laptop to retrieve those words of hope and enlightenment. it was back in april of '99 that uncle mike encouraged me to get back in the boat or the water or something like that.

some of my faithful readers have been reading between the lines and have noticed that all is not well in my little pond. paul and i tried to make the pieces fit, we really did.

we just never finished it. i sort of feel like my hands are all covered in fish guts, with soil-encrusted earthworm entrails under my fingernails, and hatch-mark scratches and gashes from the bites of the hooks. ouch.

but we're both gonna be ok.

here's a quarter...

2008-07-28T22:53:00.008-04:00

ah, the sights and sounds of a baseball game. the cheer of the crowd, the crack of the bat, the echo from the sound system. ok, when it's at a field as small as centennial (and even when it's not), we know it's really all about the food -- popcorn, sno-cones, peanuts, ice cream, hot dogs, fries, beer (not really a food), dippin' dots (not really a food either).
last night was 25 cent hot dog night at centennial. and the lake monsters were playing the Lowell Spinners, the Red Sox farm team. how could i go wrong? at first I couldn't decide which team to cheer for, but then i decided i'd root for whichever team could break the tie. and then i decided that 9:30 was way past this 30 year old's bed time, and left during the 8th inning. i heard the game went way long, and i still don't even know who won. truthfully, i don't really care. i got a 50 cent dinner out of the evening, and i'm happy.

woof woof ruf (translation: a day at the spa is in order)

2008-07-27T20:28:00.019-04:00

yesterday, while i was yoga-ing, farmer's market shopping, wimpering, whining, & licking my broken heart wounds, julie, kristi, muddy, & oli were hiking camel's hump. as is evidenced by these pictures, they were dog-tired. muddy rolled in poop -- we think from her own species. oli found himself in some interesting pricker bushes. their owners were unable to love, hug, & kiss them properly when they were in such a smelly, dirty state.
a trip to the doggie spa was a necessity. julie had bocce plans with her recent ex-boyfriend, the professor, and i was the lucky aunt elected to take over.
with so many shampoo choices, oli couldn't figure out which would work best with his unmanageable curls. we finally decided to try our luck with "buddy wash" & "buddy rinse."
muddy wasn't too sure about the ramp. and oli jumped out of the tub, hanging from his leash.
thank goodness for our protective vinyl aprons.
after that, i needed a day at the spa. i finally treated danielle to her 30th birthday present & our paws are smoother & prettier too.

busy making other plans

2008-07-20T22:29:00.016-04:00

tonight was a house-keeping night. one dirty little mess led to another dirty little mess, which led to some dusting, but then some sorting through junk, finding a few memorable items, which led to walks down memory lane, which led to thoughts and smiles, but no tears tonight. i found some notes that i have kept for years. one was one of those little cards that come with flowers, from my mother saying, Dear Suzanne, Be strong. Love will find you. Love, Mom. she sent that bouquet to me when i had just ended a very important relationship in my life. i didn't think her words would ever be true, but i kept them, holding on to that hope. i kept it like one keeps a nice fortune cookie sentiment. i keep that little card with my most important documents (my survival kit?) -- my birth certificate, my social security card, my passport, and my immunization records (am i anal & hopeless, or what?).i also found some yellowing newspaper clippings -- the first and only time i have been I Spy-ed. i remember getting the call while i was in costco of all places. it was my roommate telling me i'd been spied! i prepped myself for it, but felt the same disappointment i felt when the only dozen red roses that i got on my 21st birthday were from my mother. jess' I Spy to me said this: i spy one naked-elevator ridin', mary katherine gallagher impersonatin', stair slip-slidin', retronome booty shakin', injury laughin', "bad bad man" defeatin', mama to 3-legged ella. i wish now that i could have appreciated how much i was loved, rather than being disappointed that it wasn't the man of my dreams who had finally spied me, galloping along on his trusty horse. luckily i still have it. it will most likely remain with my passport, unless i actually do follow through on that plan years ago to laminate and magnetize it, preparing it for its rightful place on my fridge.

i remember writing a letter to my mother when i was my loneliest and most depressed, and needing to give her (and more likely, me) some hope that things were going to be ok. i told her i was happy -- that i loved life so much. in the least, perhaps my hope was that maybe when that letter finally reached her, that would be true. that was an extreme pivotal moment for me. a moment one never forgets. do i thrive on this intensity?

but life is not just about those moments that are caught on film or paper. life is not a dream or a fantasy. life is not represented by a picture. only glimpses of a life can be captured. the whole can never be revealed.

and yet, i still wait for perfection.

zestful zzzs

2008-06-29T01:05:00.010-04:00

i'm guilty. i don't know from where it transpired, but i covet fancy sheets. almost embarrassed to admit it, my (one of many) guilty pleasures is the company store. i know i can't afford it. i know they are unnecessary. i know i can find something cheaper at bed, bath, & beyond, or target, or probably even Kmart. but i need to look. a girl can dream. and sometimes there are sales, and deals too irresistible to pass up, and sometimes there are holidays or birthdays...

these lemon lime sheets seemed the perfect summer sheet. crisp, bright, fruity, and light. and how could i say no to a $13 fitted sheet, a $12 top sheet, and $5 pillowcases? did it matter if i wasn't sure if my bed was a queen or a double? no. if they were too small, well, i would make them fit, or i would pass them on to someone else who might be able to use them.

they didn't fit. but i didn't care. i yanked one corner, i fought with another, i pushed another, and i almost gave up on the last one. my bed looked a little like an upside-down opened umbrella. i still didn't care. and the corners stayed on.

best sleep i've had, whether i get 8 hours or only 5.

let me take you down

2008-06-26T22:57:00.010-04:00

strawberry season doesn't last very long in vermont. picking starts mid-june, and by the end of the month, most berries are picked over or rotted. today was perfect for picking and i filled my flat in less than 20 minutes. it was a picking frenzy and now i've too many berries for one girl to eat. i have strawberry-stained shorts, but frozen smoothie berries for the winter.

summertime isn't summertime without strawberries. it's definitely summer here in burlington, complete with flash thunderstorms followed by hot, steamy days. i had a summer treat this week when i realized i had 8 hours of personal time to use up by the end of june. i spent my free hours kaying, reading, biking, on a very long lunch, strawberry picking, & yoga-ing, and i've realized that if i had my choice, i would never work again.

so far, my summer line-up looks a little like this:

~ discover jazz fest starts the summer buzz with outdoor seating, vermonters coming out of hibernation and descending upon church street for a taste of live music
~ summer camps in full swing at the flynn, running up and downstairs between studios fetching the needs of teaching artists and campers
~ flip flops & tank tops
~ sleeping with the fan on
~ bundling under the covers because of the A/C at paul's
~ iced tea with fresh lemon
~ raspberry and vanilla cremees with rainbow sprinkles
~ wet dogs
~ saturday morning jaunts to the farmer's market
~ strawberry picking & strawberry shortcake
~ franti concert on the Shelburne Museum Green
~ rainy day perusing on church street
~ the chew chew fest

and still to come:

~ boat rides, brown skin, & the smell of sunscreen
~ phantom theatre
~ 4th of july weekend at star lake
~ conquering a few adirondack peaks with uncle mark and jules
~ brewfest
~ the dreaded flynnarts summertime latin jazz week
~ AJ's house-warming party
~ blueberry picking and evening picnics
~ berry bramble pie
~ bike rides and sunsets
~ jimmy buffet coverband cruise
~ corn on the cob
~ fresh tomatoes
~ lake monster games
~ bonfires and s'mores
~ uncle arthur's 90th
~ labor day weekend at star lake

just like strawberry season, summer is over in a flash.

back by popular demand

2008-05-22T21:11:00.006-04:00

i have heard from uncle mike, holly, jess, and stranger seth that it has been far too long since i've written a blog post. i have no excuse. i'm not all blogged out as some might think. it's not that i lost my camera because i didn't. i just got busy. and then i got uninspired. truthfully, i haven't really been re-inspired, but there is much to report on.

1. i turned 30 last week. (note personal glass of white sangria)

2. paul and i went to disney world in december and lake tahoe in march. (tahoe was more fun)

3. my father turned 60 and we threw him a very nice party and then went to boston for a duck tour and a red sox game. (they won)

4. i started up my own cake decorating business, "let them eat cake" which you should definitely check out and tell your friends. (still not making much $ yet)

5. i joined facebook as my dog ella, just so i could play scrabble with julie, but then became addicted to networking and growing my e-garden.

6. i also became addicted to yoga. i just did my first unassisted handstand last week! (if you don't count the wall...)

6 is a good number. i will stop at 6.

dear & faithful readers, i cannot promise that i will write often. but i do appreciate your support and kind words.

turkey day

2007-11-25T22:42:00.000-05:00

gobble

gobble gobble

gobble gobble gobble

oink

snore

happy thanksgiving!back to weight watchers tomorrow!

soxy sox

2007-11-18T21:31:00.000-05:00

last weekend i went to fairfield, vt with eva while she filmed her weekly seven days vlog, stuck in vermont, at the cabot hosiery mills annual sock sale. cabot mills is the only sock manufacturer in the state of vermont. purely homegrown -- now that's something to be proud of. every year, the mill workers clean off their factory floors and replace the machinery with tables and pile piles of socks upon them: merino wool socks, cashmere socks, wick-away socks, darn tough socks, army socks, sports socks, fancy socks, dress socks. soxy soxy socks.

i could feel the frenzy before i even entered the building. i just knew i would be tempted to knock down those grandmas who were holding the socks i wanted. but i didn't need to worry -- there were enough socks to go around. check out the video here and don't miss the frenzy next year:

happy halloween!

2007-10-31T12:50:00.000-04:00

this year, ella was a three-legged pig, oli was dogzilla, julie was a candy corn, jennie was a baby, baxter was a dragon with wings, paige was a dragon without wings, and i was the evil toothfairy (check out my tool belt). dad didn't win the adult free-hand pumpkin carving, but the red sox won the world series anyway. and baxter won the under 12 free-hand pumpkin carving, but we all really know that his aunt carved the train. too much candy, cake, and sugar was consumed by all. all in all -- a good time was had.

falling forward

2007-10-15T16:12:00.000-04:00

fall is my favorite time of year -- the colors, the smells, the apples, the cider donuts, the pies, the way the sun sets lower and gives everything a warm amber hue, the pumpkins, the craft fests, the corn mazes, the candy, the bringing out of sweaters, the chopping of firewood. this is what my fall looked like...

p.r.p.s. (post run post script)

2007-09-30T16:53:00.001-04:00

i'm lying in bed, freshly showered, feeling those 13.1 miles in my calves. it was a gorgeous day. derek made it in in less than an hour and 40 minutes, jennie was in in 2 hours 9 minutes, and i came in at 2 hours and 12 minutes (official results). julie was there with the kids to cheer us on, and paul rode around on his mountain bike handing us energy gus and cheering us on at various spots on the course. woo hoo!

see jane run. see jane run and run and run and then see jane run some more

2007-09-16T09:12:00.000-04:00

this is my older sister jennie. in a few weeks, on sunday, september 30, she will be running her first half marathon. i will be running my second half marathon. we'll be catching the changing of the foliage first hand as we cruise the streets of waterbury, vt in the annual Leaf Peepers race. jen and i have been training together since july, logging what first started out as 12 miles a week, to what has now become over 20 miles a week. we are following hal higdon's half marathon training schedule for novices. while we have run in the vermont city marathon as a relay team and at the catamount 5 K summer races, we're definitely still in the novice category.

like many of the challenges that i take on in my life, to face this particular feat, i had to double dog dare myself and tell lots of people that i was going to do it. That way there was no way i could possibly back down. (i definitely did this when i joined the peace corps -- how could i tell people i was going, and then not go? for that matter, how could i pay my $30 entrance fee and not run in Leaf Peepers? oh no, not on my tight budget).

i do not like to run. not really. well, okay, it's growing on me a little bit (there is truth in those endorphines everyone talks about). but believe you me, when i first started this, i didn't like running one bit, and was just doing it to say i had faced and conquered the challenge. but running & training do become easier when you know that if you don't train, you will die while trying to run 13.1 miles. there is no option but to get out of bed at 6 am and get those miles in.

having jennie as my training partner has gotten me through those early, dark mornings, those cold, rainy miles, and the hot, thirsty ones as well. for those of you who don't know, jennie is an OB/GYN and operates on little to no sleep (no pun intended, ha ha, no need to take that literally...). how she does it i do not know (though, "i'm not a manny" might be able to shed a little light on that). on her days and nights and wee hours on call, we had a system to determine when our daily run would be. she'd call me 15 minutes before the pre-determined time and let me know whether or not she had slept. you'd think no sleep would mean no running, but that wasn't necessarily the case. one morning jen called me at 6 am to say that she'd been up since 2 am, but that she was feeling pretty good, so would like to get our 10K race-pace run in before she completely crashed. another time, jennie called me with the frantic, "i'm about to have a baby so i can't run" message (not her baby, rather, her patient's baby).

because of jennie's busy schedule with her career and her family, i rarely get to spend quality time with her. training for Leaf Peepers has given us a chance to catch up, and is perhaps one of the reasons that i now don't mind running and actually look forward to it. also, if i have to toot or need an emergency bathroom break while running, i can with jennie. now that's a bonus that not all running partners can offer.

jen says that she will be disappointed in herself if she walks at all during our 13.1 miles. and i say nonsense. to train and face the challenge at all is enough of an accomplishment. i'm proud of her and us.

meet: julie

2007-07-25T22:56:00.000-04:00

this is julie, she is my younger, 27 year old sister. she is biking across the country at the moment -- on her aurora 800 hybrid, mind you, not her motorcycle or her moped, or anything woosy like that. oh yes, she and armin and ross left lincoln park, nj a few weeks ago, have biked between 40 and 80 miles each day, have camped out on church lawns and near town creeks. they have gone 7 days without a shower or laundry. she is now resting up in chicago for a few days (and finally reading HP 7).

check out her blog because it's fabulous and so are armin's and ross'. julie inspires me to do many things, including start up my own blog again. julie does not however inspire me to ride my bike to portland, OR. she can make me proud by doing that all by herself and i'll stay here and have a very comfortable bum.

death & taxes & cleaning

2007-04-17T23:59:00.000-04:00

in january, like everyone else in this country, i get my envelopes marked "important tax documents enclosed." however, probably unlike everyone else in this country, i promptly chuck those unopened envelopes into my very organized, orderly "look at later" pile o'crap. then on, say, oh, april 14, i actually, finally sort through that pile o' crap, and find my tax documents, along with that old receipt i was looking for, an old wedding invitation whose RSVP is past due, my map of vail that i meant to frame, those yoga videos lesh burned for me (not that those are crap!), and eva's business card (that's not crap either!).

now, i lead a pretty stress-free life. my job is with a non-profit arts organization whose perks of free dance classes and shows balance out the demanding grant accounting and performing arts class coordinating. but when tax time rolls around, i feel like i'm back in college with a term paper looming over my head, stressing out and procrastinating from doing the inevitable. i work best under pressure, and usually, when under pressure, i clean. don't ask me why. probably because cleaning is the last thing i want to do, besides my taxes. so, i clean. thanks to tax season, my home is spic & span. the fireplace and hearth are free of soot, the shelves are dusted, the floors are mopped, the carpets are vaccuumed, the kitchen counters and sink are scoured, and so is the coffee pot, the bathroom is soft-scrubbed and the mirrors are windexed. piles o' crap are sorted through and filed and arranged neatly. even my finger and toe nails are trimmed and my eyebrows are neatly plucked! i've cleaned out my inbox and deleted old emails and i've arranged my sharpies in rainbow order. only then do i log onto turbotax and get started.
all in all, it wasn't that bad, and my taxes are done for 2006. The 2007 pile o' crap has already been started.

this dear readers, is all just to say, that when you picture me in my last moments of life, inhaling my last breaths, please do not picture me on my death bed, but see me with a duster in one hand, a vaccuum cleaner in the other, and mops on my feet like pippi longstocking. and rest assured, i will be wearing clean underwear!

5 lb. *

2007-04-15T23:29:00.000-04:00

i just discovered something. while looking for FAT pictures of myself, i came across only a few (please notice double chin in picture 1 and rolls in picture 2). this discovery by no means means that i am not a bit chubby. it merely means that i delete any bad picture of myself before posting to ofoto. looking through photos and starting to draft this blog in my head also helped me realize something else: i'm really not that chubby (or at least that's what all my unconditionally loving friends and family will/should assure me), perhaps just a little squishy in places with some jiggly bits. ah well, more to love, and as jules and i always reassure eachother, "we are good people."
but years of turning bright red after moments of physical exertion, of being picked last in gym class, and of being made fun of in elementary school, have slightly skewed my self-image. everybody's got something they wish they could physically change about themselves (and if they don't, they're lying).
almost 4 months ago now, i was inspired by my new & fabulous roommate hannah to join weight watchers. it really is a great program. so far, i've lost 15 lbs. and i've dropped almost 2 sizes! it's very exciting. when you first weigh in, they tell you that your first goal is to lose 10% of your current weight. depending on your age, height, sex, and daily activity level, you are assigned a certain number of "points" you can eat each day. Every single food item that you may ever allow to pass your lips does indeed have a point value, which can easily be determined by the fabulous ww sliding scale chart. it factors in calories, fat, and grams of fiber (which you soon realize is very very important -- the more fiber something has, the less points it is!) weight watchers have an amazing amount of point tricks up their sleeves -- have you heard of a 1 point English Muffin? or a 1 point wedge of cheese? what about the fact that most steamed vegetables don't even have a point value?! a single dove chocolate is only 1 point, so no need to deprive yourself of life's necessities. that is actually the point of ww -- eat in moderation, but no need to abstain. it's not a diet, it's a lifestyle change. i've got to be careful, or one of these days, i might actually be one of the ww preachers... or is it too late?
ww has little incentives too -- every week you lose weight you get a gold star sticker; every 5 lbs. you lose, you get a 5 lb. gold sticker star; when you lose your first 10%, you get a keychain that is shaped as a 10; when you reach your ultimate goal, you get a gold star charm to fit on your keychain; and when you've maintained your ultimate goal weight for longer than 6 weeks, you are officially a lifetime member and no longer have to pay monthly dues, even if you gain all the weight back! i got my keychain already, now i'm working on my 4th 5 lb. *
well, just wanted to catch you all up on some of the somethingsomething i've been up to lately and to include some rather hilarious pictures of yours truly. hopefully next time, i'll be DOWN to somethingsomething more and fitting into my size sixes quite comfortably!

somethingsomethingdotcom

2007-03-28T23:31:00.000-04:00

wow, when my automatic web address finder doesn't even recognize somethingsomethingdotcom before i have to type it all out, that's when i really know that it's been way too long since i've posted. perhaps i got stuck in a valentine's day blizzard, perhaps i've been on a ski vacation in vail, perhaps i've been drinking too much, perhaps i've been trying to figure out my love life. or perhaps i just haven't had anything to say. but, we all know that isn't true -- i've always got a little somethingsomething to say! i'll be back soon, promise!

be mine swine

2007-02-14T14:14:00.000-05:00

valentine's day would not be valentine's day without the color pink. let's take a moment to celebrate the color that makes heart day possible and also, perhaps, for those people who aren't fans of the big LOVE day, a bit unbearable.

pink: is for little girls; is the name of a rock star who has a song called "get the party started;" can be hot or light; is the beginning of the name of our little finger; is the color that pigs are. and that's what this post is really all about.i do believe that most people have a "thing" that they like to collect. if they don't, they should, for the simple reason that then it makes them easier to buy for. my grandmother loves owls and owns probably hundreds of figurines and stuffed animals and pictures and kitchen towels all featuring that wise old sage. She even has one of Picasso's owls (which I hope to one day inherit...). my mother is more a collector of anything flowers and anything red. dad is easy: golf. cathy benware: watermelons. mo: hello kitty. holly: frogs. kel: anything paris. what's your thing?
mine is and always has been pigs. i don't know why. maybe because i love charlotte's web. maybe because i felt like i could relate to them somehow. and, then there's the obvious fact that pigs are pink, my favorite color of course. way back when, if friends and family didn't know what to buy me, anything with a pig on it would be a good standby. if friends or family happened to pass by something pig-like, they would most likely think of me. i'm not sure if that is a good thing or not... one day i decided that i had enough pigs and much to the shock, horror, and dismay of my friends and family, i announced that i no longer wanted anything pig.

i still have a few practical, adult pig things, and every now and then, i appreciate the occasional pig gift. but mainly now i accept flowers, chocolate, purses, and scarves. here's hoping you enjoyed your valentine's day, that you received your "thing," and that you didn't make too much of a "squealer" out of yourself on valentine's day treats!

picture 1: real pig on church street walking around with its owner, but no leash.
picture 2: childhood pig collection (the pig with the purple bow is battery operated and walks, oinks, and wags its curly tail).
picture 3: adulthood pig collection (that's a pig cutting board and a pig pancake maker).
picture 4: what the inside of the bowl tells you after you finish an entire bowl of ice cream.

crèmmmmmmme brûlée

2007-02-07T23:23:00.000-05:00

crème brûlée has recently become one of my top favorites. while burnt cream may not sound appetizing, this custard based caramelly vanilla-ey dessert is one of the more decadent items on most fancy places' menus. first, you can't deny that having your very own ramekin filled with this deliciousness beats a piece of chocolate cake on a boring old plate that anyone can just reach a fork over and steal a bite from. The ramekin protects you and your dessert from scavenging dining parners. And believe me, protecting that sweet shell is what you want to do. Second to actually tasting crème brûlée is getting to smash through that sugary outside for its sweet inside. now that you know this information about my latest weakness, imagine my delight when Derek was given his very own mini blow torch, set of eight ramekins, and crème brûlée starter kit for christmas. his creation was just about the best thing i've ever tasted, until...
...not only does derek make a mean crème brûlée (and basically any other recipe you put in front of him), he works at ben & jerry's as a consultant. most vermonters and fans of ben & jerry's (of which i am both) know that when you are an employee at b&j's, you get to take home 3 free pints of ice cream a day. in addition, not only do you get a free gym and weight watchers membership, but you get to taste the "trial" flavors as well! i'm not sure if i should be spilling this top secret information, but i can't imagine that anyone other than my friends and family are reading this blog, so i'm gonna spill it: the other night D. brought home a pint of b&j's not yet released, not yet perfected, CREME BRULEE ice cream. just about the most amazing thing i've ever tasted in my entire life. it's that good. can't wait for it to be out on the freezer shelves. i wonder how many points a whole pint is worth...

i heart clouds too

2007-01-18T23:09:00.000-05:00

when i was in 2nd grade, my parents told me that i could redo my holly hobby room with new wallpaper and new carpeting and new bedding and new curtains. their only advice was to remember that this was what my room would be like for many, many years. in fact, they told me it would be the room i stayed in when i returned for college breaks, so that i best choose wisely and definitely not something i would tire of or outgrow. i perused the sherwin williams books and heeded their warning. i just knew i would NEVER EVER get tired of those cute little brown bears with their pink hearts. (if you look very closely you can see them). pink was obviously my favorite color and OBVIOUSLY that would NEVER change. um, so yes, i chose pink -- pink carpet, pink striped sheets and comforter, pink curtains (that mom actually made from the same striped sheets), and yes, a pink sky (because i do, and have always, loved clouds)!

my 2nd grade self may have been my own downfall. her beliefs in love at first sight and romance and soulmates and that she would never tire of pink still haunt me today, even though i try to rationalize what life and love really are. still, it's refreshing to return home and see that my pink room -- with its disney romance movie posters, the cross-stitch i made when i was in 8th grade claiming that "love is neither black nor white," the official star registry when brett bought that star for me and named it "por sempre," mom and dad's treadmill (because my room is now their workout room, paige's crib (because that's where paige and baxter now sleep) and of course my pink sky -- still represents who i am and was. do i still love the pink bears? of course i do.

suz posts about eva, eva posts about suz, suz posts about eva again

2007-01-12T11:33:00.000-05:00

eva posted about my post about her (read her post)! aaaawwww. we're so halmarky cheesy corny, it's enough to puke. how come nobody ever comments on my blog except eva, lani, and me? come on friendly readers, make a blog girl's day and write some comments!

post post post. isn't that a funny word?

eva's gone...

2007-01-08T19:42:00.000-05:00

eva has left the flynn! when i first interviewed with the flynn's education department, eva immediately struck me as someone with whom i desperately wanted to be friends, but someone with whom i was just probably not cool enough to actually be lucky enough to become friends with. little did i know. she wore bright, hip clothing, was artsy and confident, and had a certain je ne sais pas...

in my first days at the flynn, eva celebrated her birthday and went off to what i soon learned was her annual exodus to shelburne farms -- her dream home in which she escaped reality by going back in time to antebellum tea times, lounging on gorgeous day couches, reading musty books, strolling through the gardens, playing billiards in the game room, wishing that every other guest would go away so that she, her sister, and her mother could enjoy their lovely home to themselves. while i had been to the farms, i had never realized its vastness or that there was an inn with different colored rooms and a black and white tiled floor parlor in which to eat! eva brought back a calendar from her trip and got me hooked on shelburne farms -- one of the first things eva introduced to me.

next i was to find out that eva had her very own public access show -- the deadbeat club. she filmed this monthly, hour-long show with her sister and mother, and produced, edited, and snipped it to perfection with her own skill, experience, and pure inspiration. her show includes weekly updates, news reports on today's hottest and dumbest stars, impersonations of said stars with their faces taped on to barbie dolls and voiced over by eva and her sister, tales of life in california, babes of the month, dance, picture, and music montages of every theme imaginable, and oh so much more. my first thought was how i would LOVE to get to cameo on her show. would i ever get to be good enough friends with her to get to be on the deadbeat club? i was given pins, and then a t-shirt, and then finally, eventually, i was given a cameo on the show! i felt so honored and excited -- i got to wear authentic 70s & 80s thrift store finds from eva's closet, make myself up with some of the reddest lipsticks and bluest eyeshadows, fashion some very large earrings, and be as dramatic as i could possibly be. watching eva work, whether it's behind the camera, in front of the camera, or at her very large computer screen that is also connected to a tv and to about 8 hard drives that she's named jane austen and bronte and other such names, is inspiring in itself. and then, getting to see yourself in her eyes -- well that just takes the triple chocolate mousse cake! check out some of eva's masterpieces that i got to star in and then check out the rest of her youtube vlog creations:

1: where is my mind?
2: the offasty 1: burnt toast
3: the offasty 2: stolen yogurt
4: the offasty 3: losing aimee
5: the offasty 5: room with a view

eva's blog & vlog have been mentioned in seven days and in the burlington free press, and she is going to make it bigtime sometime soon, i just know it! eva is the one who introduced me to blogging and encouraged me to start my very own somethingsomething blog. she taught me how to create links and embed youtube videos.

let's see other things about eva: she beats me hands down on sex and the city knowledge (and i thought i had that one in the bag); makes a killer mojito; speaks in a british accent flawlessly; dances cabaret jazz like fosse; sings "diamonds are a girl's best friend" better than marilyn monroe herself; loves the sunshine; reads more books, watches more movies, and drinks more tea than anyone i know; knits personal wrist warmers for her dear friends; frequents mirabelle's just as often as me; is the best damn secret IM/chat partner i've ever had; is deeper than the deepest chasm in the ocean; is the best listener and crier EVER; is incredibly strong and inspiring; and many many other things. you'd have to be crazy (or on cocaine and a fugly loser nobody sex-fiend) to let this girl go. (she would be my lover and my betrothed if it weren't for our being straight and all).

that's why i'm so glad i don't have to let her go. eva's not gone -- she's just going back to school to follow her dreams of web design and to feed her technological hunger. mark my words, we'll all be seeing her soon!

good luck eva! i'll miss you in the offasty, but am happy to know that you're much more happier out there than in here!

weekend snow, ski, and sledding report

2007-01-01T20:00:00.000-05:00

snow, glorious snow! we finally got some, and with a long holiday weekend ahead of us, julie, danielle, em, oli, ella, and i were ready to hit the white stuff.

friday, day 1: sugarbush. this fall, danielle and i decided we would dedicate our winter to skiing at stowe and we purchased season passes before the fall discount opportunity passed us by. we bought the "stowe 6," which meant that we just couldn't ski on saturdays and the very very fine print informed us that we also couldn't ski from 12/25-1/1. back in october we had seen this and scoffed: "oh well, that's when we'll go skiing at the other mountains -- we'll be getting in so much skiing at stowe, it won't even matter, and besides, we won't want to be there with the crowds anyway." well, with the globally warmed winter that we've had so far, danielle and i have yet to make it to stowe and felt ever so frustrated to have to pay $50 for a day at sugarbush. but pay we did because we just had to get in our skiing/riding fix. and we were lucky enough to have jules join us. it was a blast of a day. serious skiing/riding was done by all. so serious in fact, that to avoid the lines, we rode up as singles. a great suggestion by danielle, because not only did we get up the mountain that much more quickly to get in another run, but i also met a cute boy! despite said cute boy, a sunny day, new snow being made by the millisecond by alarmingly scary snowmakers, and warmly frothed hot chocolate by that machine that we all wish we had in our kitchen because no matter how hard you try, you just can't make hot chocolate taste as good as the machine does, by 1:30 our legs had had enough and we headed happily home for some apres ski napping.

saturday, day 2: cross-country skiing at lake iroquois. after our friday of down-hill skiing, jules met her friend emily in new hampshire (visiting her parents from nicaragua) and brought her to vermont for some winter fun before she flies back to the tropics. the snow was falling when we got up and continued all day. the temp was mild and we wanted to get the dogs out for a good run. we hit the cross-country trails kindly maintained by the lake iroquois recreation department. the cover wasn't the greatest and our skis might need a waxing, but huffing up those hills, screaming down those hills, and seeing the dogs joyously stretch their legs was well worth it. so nice to get fresh air in the middle of nature!

on a side note, later that night ella's hind leg seemed to be bothering her so much from her day's exertion, so i gave her half an advil, only to be reprimanded later by both sisters: "are you an idiot? that could cause renal failure and internal bleeding!" after which a frantic call to the vet was made and i was told not to worry -- i hadn't given her enough of a dose to cause renal failure, but i could make her throw up by giving her some hydrogren peroxide. poor ella! stupid me! but all is well, not to worry and she's walking fine now after a day of recuperation. next time i'll make her ride in the carrier for longer.

saturday, day 3: sledding @ the golf course. new year's eve day was another beautiful sunny mild day. i spent much of the day inside the flynn, greeting first nighters, signing them up for classes, and answering most of their questions with an "i don't know" when they asked me about particular first night events and venues that i had no idea about and luckily didn't have to authoritatively know any of the answers. a day of work needed to be rewarded with an hour or so of play and i desperately needed a kid fix as i geared myself up for my solo nye, so i headed to j & d's where the cuties were already getting suited up. (julie was meanwhile torturing oliver with a shock collar, trying to figure out how we were going to make it through nye without officially pissing off my neighbors -- more on that story and oliver's troublesome visit to aunt suzie's house to come in a future post). we headed to the golf course and took many trips up and down the hill. many other people had the same idea as the hill was crowded with merry red-cheeked sledders -- there was a shared happiness of getting to be young again in the air. baxter's laughter and screams of delight filled the air as well. that and paigey's chubby cold cheeks that i kept kissing and kissing refueled me for my evening of debauchery.

thank you snow. thank you sun. thank you snow playmates.

nye 2007

2007-01-01T15:27:00.000-05:00

i'm not usually a big fan of new year's eve. i mean, it's just the turning from one month to another. it's not like we celebrate when january turns to february or when march turns to april. besides, there are so many different calendars out there, who's to say it's a new year? but mostly i'm not a fan of the evening because i usually don't have any special plans and i'm always convinced that everyone else in the world (who celebrates new year's on 12/31) is having way more fun than me. plus this year i was to spend nye as a single, with no one to kiss at the big ball drop. poor me. so, i actually made plans this year. big plans. with lots of girlfriends too. the ECHO center down at the waterfront, a science museum/aquarium hosted a party at their amazing venue. $25 to party with the sturgeons and the turtles! five different genres of music (80s, hip hop, funk, techno, bands, etc.) were pumping from dj stations tucked in different nooks and crannies throughout the museum. my favorite place was the bow of the sunken boat, so dark and cavelike. the perfect place to spike our $2 sodas with the rum and gin filled flasks we'd snuck in for economic purposes. fireworks at midnight and then an incredibly slippery freezing ice storm topped off the evening. the cab ride home was hysterically drunken with danielle, sarah, julie, em, and i making friends with the cabbies and the other passengers. this morning was spent lounging around, reminding each other of what actually happened last night, discovering bruises, and nursing hangovers with coffee and sticky cinnamon buns, movies, and more lounging. while i may not have had someone to kiss last night, i had my girlfriends and may i just say how happy i am to have all of them. i made it to the new year. hoorah! as much as i love the holidays, i'm also relieved to see them wind down and for life to go back to normal. my charlie brown tree is gone, pine needles vacuumed, and holiday decorations put away for another year. a yummy chicken parm and brownie hot fudge sundae dinner cooked by jules and me awaits the family for a new year's day celebratory dinner. really, what more could i ask for? hello 2007!
(post script: just wanted to leave you with this fabulous image from last night. hope this guy made it up the icy hill alright!)

christmas 2006

2006-12-27T22:10:00.000-05:00

to me, christmas just keeps getting better and better. perhaps it's that we're older now and don't care so much about presents and they are not so much our focus. or perhaps it's because mom has the routine of timing and cooking breakfast, hors d'oeuvres, dinner, and decadent tiramisu and peppermint cheesecake desserts to an exact science. or perhaps it's because the kids are now around to make the days that much more enjoyable. but mostly, i think it is because more and more i appreciate being around my family, relaxing, laughing, and reminiscing with them. sure everyone has their quirky (read: annoying) moments, but even that predictability can be endearing (sometimes).

just as we have our traditions (check out everyone in their christmas eve pjs), we also go with the flow and welcome new changes and additions. Extra special additions this year were grandma trani and aunt mj making the trip from skaneateles. they haven't spent christmas with us in years and they hadn't even met paigey yet! uncle mark was off hiking (wishfully skiing, but that didn't happen) in maine, so grandma lowell didn't have her normal chauffeur. she drove herself to us on early christmas eve, in the safety of daylight and spent the night in my old room. it was such a treat to have both grandmas in the house for both christmas eve and christmas night. so nice to go to bed and wake up with a full house (including the 5 pups!) not to mention that everyone in those beds had on brand new pjs -- even the grandmas. (poor mj -- guess santa didn't get the memo on her and only got her earmuffs. hmm... maybe try again next year mj!)

there's lots more somethingsomething about christmas 2006, just not enough time to write about it and sleep!

yuletide cheer

2006-12-19T22:49:00.000-05:00

ah the holidays! i decorated my charlie brown xmas tree tonight. eva and i bought our christmas trees from city market yesterday ($20 to benefit COTS -- not a bad bargain -- a tree and a good deed!). it's crooked, misshapen, and the branches are still kind of all bunched up against the trunk, but the weight of the ornaments and lights seems to be doing its job.

i have been feeling so adult lately -- not only do i own my own place, but i have an entire box full of christmas decorations! on good advice from jennie, i have purchased at least one ornament for myself each year since i started trying this whole adult thing. this year danielle and i bought each other a friendship, hungarian, blown out, hand-painted egg. i have also amassed ornaments from various students over the years, post holiday sales, and hand-me-downs. when mom replaced her tree topper with an elegant red velvet saint nick, i proudly inherited our old angel. and since g'ma t is a pro cross-stitcher, i happen to be one of the lucky 5 grandchildren who has her very own 12 days of christmas tree skirt.

traditions are my favorite part of christmas. the comforting warmth of routine exercised with such love just can't be beat. every year since i was wearing feet pajamas, we have been allowed to open one present on christmas eve. i love that i can always count on a new pair of flannel pjs on december 24th. (except for the year that dad forgot to label which presents were the pjs and i opened up a purple sweater, turtleneck, sock combo...)

years ago, mom started buying each of us a snowbaby that was themed around the events of our year. the year i took astronomy, i got an astronomer, the year jules joined hockey, she got a hockey player, the year i tried to take my kiribati dog home with me, i got a snowbaby and her dog. mom used to display all of our figurines together, but since we've left the nest, our snowbabies have had to separate. i wonder what i'll get this year...

though the meaning of christmas, or the yuletide, or the holidays, or whatever it is we must call it these days to remain pc, has morphed from what it originally was, what remains at its heart is people trying to be as good and as loving and as caring and as grateful as they can be. whether we show it with presents or traditions or donations or charity, i have to believe that like the lights of the christmas trees, we're all trying as best we can to shine our light onto others and to celebrate the beauty that is life.

i heart clouds

2006-12-12T22:33:00.000-05:00

i love clouds. they are fluffy and white and i just wish i could grab them all up and hug them in like a warm soft down blanket.

that is why i took the opportunity this afternoon to cut myself a nice big piece of cloud. boy did i create an offasty stir! it just so happened that there was an office birthday with office cake, and as happens with offices, most people sit at their desks all day and don't exercise and are always dieting and claim that they are not eating said birthday cake even though they really want to. and then they beg everyone else to eat the cake so that it won't tempt them.

i hate dieting and i've never been one to deprive myself of anything. so i pay no attention to these abstainers, except for the part when they say "eat the cake," and i eat the cake.

just as much as i love clouds, i love cake. i also love frosting, especially frosting roses. remember when you were little and at a friend's birthday party and everyone whined as the cake was cut and pieces doled out: "can i have the rose?," "i want a rose," "i want the pink one," "i want the red one..." somehow it seemed to me like i never got a rose.

(side note: my dream cake is a circle cake with a single red rose in the middle, surrounded by orange roses, surrounded by yellow roses, surrounded by green, then blue, then purple roses, and the roses just keep going out and out in a larger circle, in rainbow order until the entire cake is covered in roses. that way everyone gets a rose! and i just know that someday my sister jennie, who is a master cake decorator, will make my dream cake come true.)

(and on another side note: an assignment i once had in elementary school was to think about what i would love a pool to be filled with instead of water. my first thought was spaghetti and meatballs. wouldn't that just be so cool to go diving in spaghetti? but my second thought was a pool full of m&ms. and dream cake #2 was born: a dog-legged pool cake filled with m&ms and also a diving board. jennie?)

but, the cake that i ate today was rainbows and clouds, a close to many of my favorite things. i gave in to the dieters' wishes, and i ate the cake. actually, i ate the center of the cake.

skump

2006-12-10T22:55:00.000-05:00

i babysat for baxter and baby paige tonight while their parents had a rare night out. now, i don't know who in their right mind would have let me, or any other 13-year old, for that matter, babysit their child when i was 13 -- but that is indeed when i started babysitting. and i was scared out of my mind. i didn't know what to do with a baby! i was always worried that i was doing something wrong and that the parents would be very unhappy when they got home. many times i called my mother in a panic and she would come help stop a crying baby who had been crying for over an hour. those were the days.

but babysitting my niece and nephew is a different story. i suppose it helps that i am now 28, over two times older than i was when i first started babysitting. or possibly that i was in the delivery room when both of them came into this world and we share a special bond. but mainly it is that they are so damn fun.

these are some of the fun and silly things that were said and done tonight: skump instead of skunk over and over again until we were in a fit of giggles and until baxter finally got the "unk" right; playing peak-a-boo with baxter's feet and suzie's eyes; baxter saying in perfect english, "naya (danielle's dog) is getting old;" baxter telling us that his friend "f*ck" was coming to his party next weekend (not really sure what he was trying to say, but it sure sounded bad and also he was playing with a duck at the time...); baxter getting out of bed after i'd already turned off the lights and shut the door, playing with his bongo drum that lights up and makes music, and telling me that he was having a "dance party;" baxter farting and peeing in the tub; baxter seeing a mommy dog and a baby dog that looked quite like oliver (julie's dog) in his bedtime book and saying, "there's two olivers"...

the list goes on and on, but i have to remember that not everyone is as enthralled with kids or baxter as i am.

oh, and i guess the fun and silly things that were said and done, were mainly done by baxter. paigey is too little to be funny yet, but she is the sweetest niece i've ever had. she takes her bottle like a pro, bounces up a storm in her jumperoo, and falls asleep so peacefully in the crook of my arms. she's damn cute too.

they just make the world that much better.

stolen yogurt

2006-12-05T19:50:00.000-05:00

in which eva gabor, abbie hepburn, and suzanne monroe are duped by the one and only deb lesh!

great minds...

2006-12-05T19:42:00.000-05:00

...think alike. eva posted her vlog about fire the same evening i posted mine. allow me to give her some props. (currently experiencing technical difficulties. stay tuned.)

FIRE!!!

2006-12-03T22:45:00.001-05:00

i recently bought myself a condo -- hoorah! a very adult thing to do. i also recently broke up with my boyfriend -- boo! a very sad thing to do. the two are related, though not really, as you soon will see.

my new place has a lovely feature that sold me immediately -- a wood stove right in the middle, nicely sectioning off the dining room from the living room. it makes it so warm and homey, even when a fire isn't burning, and then when you add the smell of the wood fire, mmmm, how can you not imagine a hot cup of cocoa and curling up with a good book?

anyway, the problem is, i'm not so adept at building said warm, good-smelling, homey fire. in fact, i downright suck at it. some people are born pyro-wizzes; i somehow lack that gene (which i just know comes directly from my father).

so, i bring in help. person # 1: danielle, my sort of sister-in-law, helped me gather kindling today. we went to the patchen road dog park and did two loops around the trails. we gathered four armloads of kindling! got to get back there before it actually snows to stock up on some more. (plus it's great running and play time for ms. ella and her friends).

what i've been trying is this: i crumple up paper, i put kindling in, i get it going, and then i put the larger log on and i just suffocate it. ok, way to solve this problem: buy an axe and cut up larger log into smaller pieces that have rough edges. rough edges are key, apparently, to really get those flames ablazing.

person #2: derek, my brother-in-law (danielle's older brother, married to my older sister, jennie) comes over. being the good brother-in-law and teacher that he is, he does not show me how to do it, but he watches me do it and gives me pointers. everyone knows that the best way to learn is to do -- thanks D! but he did help using the axe (which is sharp & scary!). hooray!

warm, homey, comfy, good-smelling fire with flames warmed my new home as we (derek, danielle, baxter & i -- jennie was on-call and at the hospital) ate yummy broccoli mushroom pie. who doesn't love pie for dinner?

who doesn't love pie for dessert? as we were being entertained by baxter eating his chocolate banana cream pie (the kid had it all over his face and was sitting in the big boy chair, without his big boy booster seat, so his head just barely cleared the table. didn't stop him from shovelling it in though)... anyway, as we were eating, the fire alarm went off! beep beep beep. beep beep beep. beep beep beep. and baby paige was sleeping! luckily she went right on sleeping. unluckily, the fire alarm went right on beeping.

but there was no fire. no, it was smoke coming from the wax that had been candles that had been on top of my wood stove. bad move. very bad move.

we turned on fans, opened windows, opened doors, fanned the alarm (i accidentally whipped danielle with the towel), got on a chair and tried to stop the damn thing to no avail, took out the battery and it kept beeping! beep beep beep. beep beep beep. no quicker way than that to make your new neighbors hate ya -- "oh great, the new girl in #10 is using her wood stove..." all the while, paigey is still sleeping, and baxter openly admitted: "i scared. i scared. all done with pie." i mean, for that kid to turn away pie, it's got to be pretty scary. probably pretty scary too for him to see 3 of the adults in his life running around like crazy people.

finally finally, derek unwired the alarm from the electricity and the beeping stopped. though baxter had cutely picked it up down to the cadence and repeated: beep beep beep. beep beep beep.

crisis averted. smoke dissipated. derek and kids packed up to go. danielle stayed to continue writing her paper. and i was left to tend the fire. uh oh.

the fire had been blazing, but needed more wood! basically, all attempts to split the log were feeble and futile. the only thing i got was a knick on my knee from a rogue hammer edge and a cooling fire. however, i did discover something in my multiple whacks at the log -- while paul is no longer here to help me build a fire (which he and his manly self would have taken charge of immediately and i never would have had to worry about it), i can and will do this on my own. it might take awhile, but the whacks just make everything feel better, whether i'm imagining the log is a log or someone else...

Cinder Ella

2006-11-29T00:43:00.000-05:00

okay, so i didn't really name ella cinderella, but does it count if i wish i had? something about it would have been so symbolic of my romantic ideals. always living in the fantasy, i suppose.

you know how they say that dogs and owners begin to resemble one another after awhile? although i don't have a beard or shaggy eyebrows, and i have only 2 legs instead of 3, ella very well could be a mini-representation of me. she loves to be around people, though she gets nervous around new ones, she's got spunk and energy, she's cute, and when she wants attention, she barks and growls at me. hmmm...

i honestly don't know what i would do without her. i'm sure there is a study, somewhere (but i haven't quite become technically savy enough yet to figure out how the heck to link to it - or have i?) that proves that petting an animal at least once a day is good therapy. i must be on the right track to some kind of therapeutic breakthrough since i rack up the ella cuddle time.

here's hoping everyone has someone like an ella!

hideaway lane

2006-10-31T15:39:00.000-05:00

Selling for $190,000 or best offer, or renting for $1300/month.

2 story Country Crossings condo conveniently located minutes from Tafts Corners, Essex Five Corners, IBM, and airport. Condo has unique sunroom and wood stove (which keeps gas and electric low), washer/dryer, dishwasher, microwave, back deck, & grill. Keeps cool in summer -- no need for A/C. 2 spacious bedrooms with plenty of closet room and extra shelf space. One "outside" parking spot & one garage parking spot. Private garage with storage space above. Garbage removal, recycling, snow removal, & grounds cleanup included. Only one pet allowed. Email to set up a showing.

Freshly painted & steam-cleaned in April 2010. Walls are now cream-colored.

the fourth

2006-07-05T23:57:00.000-04:00

the fourth was spent on lake champlain this year complete with fireworks, beer drinking, hot dogs, and blueberry & strawberry american flag cake. honestly, at this moment, that's about all i have to say about that.

shaggy vs. cleanly shaven

2006-06-21T00:54:00.000-04:00

"i like my dogs cleanly cut, just like i like my men" says my older sister jennie as she tries to convince me that ella desperately needs a haircut, as she simultaneously points out one of the differences between us. shall we have a comparison?

paul is a carpenter and in the summer time he is either working, on his boat, or in the water. This means that he doesn't really feel the need for a shower every day, or really every other day for that matter. get dirty, rinse off in the water, get dirty, rinse off again. he's got curls that make women green and have me imagining how cute his ringlets would look on a little girl (though that's another blog...). however, he has not cut those curls since about, oh, january, and even i, who love mountain men, think he could stand a trim.

about a year ago, derek decided that enough was enough and he would stop trying to deny the inevitable -- he had a severely receding hairline. So, one pleasant summer evening, out on the back deck, we brought down the razors and the buzzer and shined his head up to a glowing baldness. though a business man, d can be pretty handy himself, and has actually decided to try the stay-at-home-dad thing for awhile (check out his blog at im-not-a-manny.blogspot.com).

but this post was not meant to be about my sister's and my significant others' grooming styles, but rather, the issue of miss shaggy ella...

she just looks so damn cute when she's fluffy, but with the heat, i couldn't feel like a good owner until i did something about the layers of fur that were beginning to suffocate her. besides, jennie wanted to be able to see her "pretty girl eyes."

hence, the lesson on how to groom a schnauzer. when jennie was in hershey she went to a dog grooming course, bought an electric razor and some sheers, and voila - no more having to pay a fortune to have your dog cleanly cut. the day was fun, i got really hairy, ella got less hairy, and everyone was happy, except paul, who thinks ella looks like a the monster that comes out of the guy's stomach in alien. oh well, you can't please them all!...

paulie and i are off for 4 days and 3 nights of hiking and camping at moosebrook state park in NH and then on to boston to visit jules and to catch a red sox game. stay tuned for more somethingsomething!

step by step

2006-06-15T23:09:00.000-04:00

well, it looks like if i want to add my picture to my profile i need to copy and paste the url link of a picture of myself that is already on the internet. the only places that i could find pictures of myself were on ofoto and on my gmail account, and apparently the url link for those pictures were more than the 68 character limit, so those wouldn't work. next step is to post a picture here from my original picture files and then copy that link. let's give that a whirl...

hoorah! it worked after about 5 different tries. but i am realizing that if you read the help info -- it really does help.

speaking of steps. i recently bought ella some. they were a cheap $10 at the christmas tree shop that took me about a half hour to put together (with p's help). they come comlete with a lovely lambswool carpeting! ella ran right up the first time onto the couch (goaded with a treat) and i laughed and hoorayed with glee. she seemed a bit surprised and hasn't really taken to them since, unless she's very very excited.

you see, ella needs stairs because she can't very well get up on the couch to lounge and relax with only 3 legs. how she lost her leg is debatable, because do dogs really have umbilical cords? and if they don't, then what could it have been that cut off the back right's circulation? it's a mystery.

a little time

2006-06-08T22:57:00.000-04:00

phew. finally a little time to play catch up. how come there never seems to be enough time to connect with the people who really matter and my day is spent associating with people who don't matter as much?

so, a little update on me, and hopefully i'll keep this blog current enough that friends can peruse this regularly. i'm a little nervous about it. everyone blogs these days -- i'm always a little late with the times. and i always say "i'll never do that" and then i end up realizing it's cool and i do it too. like the time i vowed i would never wear "jesus shoes" and then bought myself two pairs of birkenstocks after everyone else had already been wearing them for years. and then when i bought them, i said at least i would never wear them with socks, but then eventually i did that too. my swearing off of capris only lasted so long too.

and so you find me here, writing this blog, just like everyone else seems to be doing these days. maybe not wholly original, but that doesn't mean i can't be.

noteworthy news: i just got a new laptop so hope to be doing this regularly. check back soon!